i just got through texting my wife a bit and one thing i said was that i miss going out to the movies with her, because she mentioned going to see a movie and she said you never liked those movies, and i told her neither did you and then she said her best friend wanted to go see it, so i said i missed going places with her and her response was i bet so being stuck at the house, and i told her yes, but i miss things with you, even if it was a walmart run and she said i need to make friends, i told her, do you really think thats a substitute for you and then she said it would help the loneliness... to which i said not the kind i have, i guess yoou dont get me, goodnight and she replied with...night
so i feel like worthless replacable shit.....if i can say that on here, i feel like a roaches pile of shit.
When I get anxious I tend to catastrophize. I mean like crazy unreasonable " what ifs". I think I watch too many movies lol. I have to laugh sometimes to diffuse the anxiety of the thoughts which come from anxiety. So it is like a vicious circle. I don't know if I am making sense! I know the worry is unrealistic and unfounded but find it disturbing to have the thoughts. Ugh!