Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
So I am almost ready to get my master's degree, I will be done in two months. For the last year, I've been subsititute teaching. In this past Fall semester, it's been harder than ever. I'm not sure why. I used to teach full time, maybe it was better when I had my own classroom and control over the situation. I am getting my degree in another area outside of education.
I try to pick up as many hours as I can, and worked a full week last week. For some reason I found it to be incredibly stressful. Some of the jobs are really great, and some not. Throughout the day some of the students were extremely nasty and I had to call the administration more than once. During these difficult days, it reminds me of why I am leaving and I find myself avoiding picking up jobs because of the stress level and my general awful mood when I come home. On my study days I generally feel fine.
I had put off applying to positions in my new field because I had tried last fall and spring, and got so many rejections. I figured I would just wait until I got my diploma and then start applying. But, with as bad as I was feeling on my current job, I thought maybe I should start prior to graduation. I was invited to apply at a company that had rejected me this summer, so I was kind of stung and reluctant to try to apply again. I thought about it for a bit, the hiring window was a whole month. Once I worked up the nerve to reapply, three weeks after the invitation...I tried to today...the postion has been filled now. I was just so busy I could not get to it, and kind of scared too. It was only part time, and I think that I am going to need a full time job, so maybe it's for the best.
Tomorrow I will be going to a hiring fair for Honeywell, so I will not be subbing...and I've lost four days this week. I was very sick for two weeks, a very bad sinus infection. It went away for a week and then came back and settled into my ear. Been sick like a month now. I will lose time from work to go to this fair, but there is a resume review and you get to talk to people. I can't let my fear of rejection stop me. I almost didn't apply for loan cancellation due to my fear of rejection...and it's a good thing I didn't let my fear get to me because after a few rejections, I got my loan cancelled! I need to apply that same persistence to my job hunt-no matter how hard it gets. Also need to apply it to dating. I've had a lot of rejections, but I can't be stopped by that. I guess nothing is really easy and rejection is part of the deal in life.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
Substitute teaching is the worst. The students have no respect as is and are horrible to subs. I personally haven’t done it but know friends whom have. Hopefully you weren’t subbing middle school cause they are usually the worst.
I blame the parents.
And it looks like you are figuring out how to push yourself through rejection. I don’t know how specialized your field of work is but if the jobs are competitive meaning there aren’t a lot hiring be patient. I think many places are waiting to see what happens with the election and economy before hiring more people. I have friends whom unfortunately had to move to different states for their specialized fields.
Dating is a whole different ball game. Finding a human worth dating feels next to impossible. I have the worst luck in picking guys and am not in a good relationship as is so I have no advice on that one. But trying to date on line and guys being all superficial it’s hard even to find someone worth talking to.
You will likely not be in the same control as a newbie at whatever job you get when you graduate. I'll tell you something. Most employers are looking for people with experience to do their job right off the bat. They don't want to train. So if you are applying to jobs without all the qualifications, you will not be considered. Period. Sorry to be blunt but this new way of hiring with it being online applications means the algorithms automatically remove anyone without the exact qualifications.
There are good things lately, the job fair at Honeywell will give you the opportunity to practice interviewing. Ask someone if you have the right keywords in your resume for their computer to send you to the good pile, instead of automatic rejection. And your student loan forgiveness is a good thing.
I've had a lot of rejections in life also, and in job hunting. I went back to get a master's in social work and found the job situation was depressing to me. I was quietly banned as too old and then I found the work was oppressive and often unethical. And social workers have this big deal about ethics except we didn't treat patients and clients that way for the most part. Sigh.
Every job and person we meet has good and bad in their personality or atmosphere. Just hang in there. Look around, keep trying, rejection strengthens us if we let it. Pay attention to how the potential employers speak and what their job description says. Keep going -- you can can do this.