My depression is really dragging me down today, of all days. I have to say, it is the worst I've felt for quite some time now. I am not diagnosed for depression but honestly, I don't need a doctor to tell me I'm depressed. I feel like I have no one to talk to, and no one in my family who can relate to this feeling. My husband asked me what's wrong and what is it that makes me depressed. I don't know, and I couldn't tell him, other than the fact it's a whole bunch of things accumulated overtime (being jobless, money problem, family problem etc). I just feel so tired at the moment and I want to just sleep the day away. I know this isn't healthy, and my husband depends on me to keep him moving. He works the night shift, so every day, I prepare his meals, medicine and everything he needs. When he's at work, I have no one can talk to and even when he's home, he's too tired. I tried to tell my mum and my best friend about this feeling, and I don't think they can relate to me because their advice so far was to tell me to just shake off the feeling and focus on other things.
Some of you here responded to my previous issue regarding my anxiety over a job I was applying. Well, I got news yesterday that I didn't make it. Again, this dragged me down further. I wanted to prove to myself and everyone that I am worth something and that I can be independent. At my state right now, I'm not so good with rejection. My husband tried and failed to make me feel better by saying "Well, I see it as a good thing, because your presence keeps me going and you're helping me every day to get ready for my work (meaning if I work, I can't cook for him or get things ready for him)". He depends on me heavily to do everything for him in the background because he is the type of person who can focus on just one thing at a time. I don't mind doing the things I am doing for him now, in fact, I've been nothing but supportive to everything he's been doing. But I feel as though my life and my purpose is to serve him. What about me? When someone ask me a question like, What do you see yourself doing in 10yrs time? What do you want in life?... I seriously don't know. I thought about it a lot, but I just don't know
In June, I am going to be going on a trip to Florida with my mom and brothers and we are getting there by plane and I'm really nervous about that. I've only flown on a plane one other time and I was 2 years old and I don't remember anything about it. The thought about being in a giant metal bird going who knows how high up into the air terrifies me. Also, I'm scared that the plane is going to...
I hate having an anxiety disorder. I was doing well for a bunch of months.I have been taking my meds, meditating, trying to live in the moment.Last few days my anxious brain is acting up.