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Mom.

Black_Rose63
Black_Rose63

I juet wanted her to see me. To actually see me. My words werent working anymore. It felt like talking to brick wall. I thought leaving would make her see me. To see that I was in pain. To see that I was hurting. But instead. I got called a child. Hows that fair? All I've wanted was to be good enough for her. Why couldn't I do that and be me at the same time? Why does leaving mean no relationship? Why does me trying to be happy mean Ive lost my mom. Why cant she see me? Why cant she just listen? Im her daughter. Shes not supposed to be the reason Im hurting. Why do I have to miss her? Why does it have to hurt this much? It feels like ive lost my mom. And its not fair. I just wanted her to see me to listen to me. Not just completely ignore me and hate me. Maybe she doesnt hate me. But I dont think Ill ever be enough for her. And it hurts. Im so tired. Tired of feeling not good enough. Im tired of her still having a hold of me even tho im gone. I want to let go of her. But I dont know how. Can someone please tell me how to let go of someone who was once Youre safe place?


billwfriend
billwfriend
It is difficult to leave the nest. Parents are humans and may have issues we dont get insight to see.

I do not know you but can understand because my dad and I had tortured relationship all my life.
Hugs bill
Your not alone. Get support systems built around you that are better than your mean mom
anona123
anona123
Hello. My mom is also the source of a lot of pain. It's going to be especially tough for you as a daughter - the mother/daughter bond should be strong. I was never super close with my mom, but my dad died when I was 15 so she's the only parent I've known for so long. But now we don't speak and I know it's part of the puzzle as to why I have mental health issues. You can let go but just know it's something you'll need help with. I'd suggest seeing a therapist.
She must have issues of her own. I know my mom does but I really don't know what it is exactly.
rianbooyer
rianbooyer
I can tell you one thing about this "Can someone please tell me how to let go of someone who was once Youre safe place?"

you don't, if there are relationship (including mom to daughter) you keep fighting and trying. There may be something else going on you don't see but your mother most likely loves you more than you are seeing... or at least i hope so. I don't know the history so i can't give a good analysis.

Try sitting her down and talking to her. Tell her of your pain and you needing her. Nothing is ever solved by silence.
jannytheresa
jannytheresa
It's hard to comprehend how the person who is supposed to love
and protect you is either unwilling or unable to do so.
The words MOM and MOTHER bring up images of a person who
is supposed to love you unconditionally.
The reality is many mothers cannot and do not.
The relationship, as you've alluded to , often cause pain.
It seems that your mother loves you with conditions. It's on her
and not you. Let yourself grieve, feel the pain, cry and process the loss.
My guess is that she'll come around, but hopefully if she does it will be
on your terms
Christina09
Christina09
I think that she wants to set you free and if your love is strong then you will come back. Maybe you have some hurt feelings and old wounds that need to heal and she senses it. Have a peaceful conversation if that is possible, if not then don't push the buttons.
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