This sadness and solitude is a natural process of your self-discovery. You say you have no hobbies or passions or goals. You're contemplating the point of life. It sucks when you're in it and sometimes you can feel suicidal, thinking maybe there is no point and no out, so I'm going to take the only out I can see. If you see all this happening to you and understand that its just another human process, it won't feel as overwhelming. In a way you might find yourself fortunate in the end. You may come to discover worthy goals, passions, hobbies and people that you otherwise would not have had you just gone through the normal run of the mill life scenario. Everyone is different, has different talents, different experiences of life and different outcomes but that's the beauty as many will say. You're part of an immense diversity and your solitude and sadness is forcing you to look deeper at life. Sometimes that can mean deep sadness and depression. Deep loss and regret. But there's a counter part to that also. Remember that. The feeling of sadness itself if you look at it from an evolutionary functional perspective, has the attribute of causing a person to turn their attention within. Its there for a reason. Its only an illness when it gets the better of you, which it can. But with a little understanding and awareness you can use it. It can transform you. And if you go really deep you can feel these negative emotions in their raw form and let it consume you and find that they disappear and in their wake is abundant energy and creativity. Then you see they really do have a function, they just never got a chance to run their course. But you will get to that point in time. For now just know there's nothing wrong with you as a person. You're very special and have not wasted your life. Your life has barely started! If any of this makes sense to you I'm glad but if it doesn't don't worry about it.

Well, it's natural to feel sad sometimes especially when expectation fail or delay but if you feel sad and moody regularly, you could need help.
The state of your mind and the thoughts you ponder on over time could metamorphose to sadness and depression, and victims often get detached, less friendly and even hates themselves, this means that it's you that drives people away from you but unconsciously.

Conscious determination to turn the table around will help. Reject every negative thoughts and meditate more on positive ideas and events.
Find someone to talk who can encourage you, be mindful of what you feed your eyes and mind with, they have the potentiality of either making someone illusive or inclusive. Sadness could sometimes be the first stage of illusion.

If possible get a support system that can guide you a step at a time, gradually you'll get transformed and able to discover your purpose.

Have you ever taken a personality test? I went back to school a few years ago to finish up a degree and one of the first things we had to was take a Meyer Briggs personality test. That was when I began to understand how I was wired. Here's a similar test: https://www.16personalities.com/personality-types. Then earlier this year I was laid off and, of course, depression set it. I had to seek help. The medicine I'm on really helps me cope, but I've also spent a lot of time over the these past 8 months learning about me. When you know what your personality type is, you can google it and learn a lot. I enjoy the silences and need time by myself, but there are times when I need to be with someone, not a lot of people, just a close friend or 2 suffice. Learning about who I am, and how I'm wired has been huge for me to accept who I am and work with it.

so if it is me unconsciously driving people away, do you have any ideas or steps i can start to take to not do that?

I feel the exact same way at times. Hopeless, unmotivated, tired all the time, but don't sleep well, I'd rather be alone and not talk to anyone. I've been taking Prozac on and off for 20 years. I'm now off it and are trying L-theanine, it's sort of an all natural Xanax. A good Bible believing church and friends have really helped. As alone as you might feel , Jesus Loves you very much and so do I. Meditate upon God's Word.

I feel the exact same way at times. Hopeless, unmotivated, tired all the time, but don't sleep well, I'd rather be alone and not talk to anyone. A good Bible believing church and friends have really helped. As alone as you might feel , Jesus Loves you very much and so do I. Meditate upon God's Word.

I think the very best thing is to get diagnosed. Until you know what is wrong, I'm not sure how you can deal with it. What do you think?

ive gone to a therapist before and they never specifically said, "hey you have anxiety/depression" or anything like that, it was more me talking. it was helpful to talk to someone but i cant be spending that much money when they never gave me ways to cope

@bellabuck thank you for that personality test, i really liked it