Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Mental Health
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I'm suffering

carolk1955
carolk1955

I'm not doing so well. This has been going on for awhile with no end in sight. I saw my therapist yesterday and it was not a good session. Fortunately, I hope, I have a session with a new therapist on Monday. I do hope that goes better. I'm depressed, anxious, and lonely. I've had arthritis in my left knee that seems to be getting worse and the pain never goes away. The meds don't seem to work anymore. I have very little ambition. My apartment needs to be cleaned up and I have no motivation to do that. Or anything. I miss the days when I had a cat. I could have one where I live but they want a $300 deposit plus $10 added to the rent each month. Social Security screwed up yesterday, not giving me the amount of money they said they would in the benefit letter. I called them and hopefully that will be straightened out. They cut my food stamps from $250 to $20 a month. I was found ineligible for assistance with my electric bill. I can't control the thermostat in my apartment and it's always 68 degrees. So I invested in space heaters. And I'm not allowed to apply for LIHEAP because technically, heat is included in the rent. 


I wish I felt like moving right now. My application for Section 8 that I applied for 6 months ago finally came through. I'd have to find my own place to live and there was a time when I felt up to that. I don't feel like looking for a place to live right now. I don't have my car anymore and I miss it alot. 


I don't know what to do. I'm feeling pretty hopeless that things will ever get better. 


I just had to share that. Maybe someone will be able to identify with me and I won't feel so alone.

GreenEyes727
GreenEyes727
Hi. I have been disabled for 3 years due to physical and mental problems. My house has been a mess for years except right after I went out on disability when my wonderful sister-in-law helped me clean. Now it is worse than ever. I have always chalked it up to depression but I now think a lot of it stems from my underactive thyroid. I've been on thyroid medication for about 40 years. I've recently been following Dr. Daniel Amen on Facebook Watch and YouTube. He's amazing! He talks about getting checked for thyroid antibodies. I am going to look into this. I cannot continue to spend most of my time on the couch. I wouldn't be able to take 68 degrees. I get lonely sometimes. My last cat Joey died last January and I was so devastated and lonely. I now have a 7 month old kitten. I got him in August. He means a lot to me. I wish you could afford a car. Why do landlords have to do that? I hope things go well with your new therapist. Maybe he or she will have some fresh ideas. Keep us posted. We are all here for you. Write as much as you need to.
GreenEyes727
GreenEyes727
I meant cat but it would also be nice if you had a car.
carolk1955
carolk1955
Thank you so much for your feedback. I had many cats over the years, a few of them kittens, and I loved them dearly and cared for them their whole lives. And I'm sure they loved me too. I was just reading about the laws for emotional support animals, which are not pets and the landlord can't charge me the pet deposit to get one. I hope that works out. I believe my family doc checks my thyroid hormones every year, but I'm not sure about the antibodies. I will look into that further. It bothers me to get a cat, but not have a car. How will I get it to the vet if it gets sick? That is a problem that will need to be solved. I didn't mention I have no family left. I was an only child and my parents died in 2004 and 2006. I was married for 25 years until my husband died in 2017. I miss being married, just having a companion. Now I have no one. I will let you know how things go with the new therapist.
MelT2020
MelT2020
Hi CarolK1955. Glad you have a therapist. I'm an only child too, and my dad died years ago when I was 8. Counting my blessings for my mom. I was in a car accident during this week's winter storm. About $2,000 in repairs with a $500 deductible. (Seems like one trial after another). Lost my husband, 13 year career and home in 2020. I've also lost other family members in 2021.
One of the peers on DS recently said: feel the sadness but don't let the sadness control your life. That's what I've been doing lately feeling my feelings and then living my life knowing that no situation is permanent. As long as we are on the planet we have a chance to move forward. Your courage to post sparks me to now look for the light of hope. Keep moving forward (gentle hug)
maria718
maria718
Carol, I've had more downs than you can shake a stick act. The one thing that puts things in perspective for me is that I say to myself: "There are people out there who have it worse". And there ARE people out there that have it worse.
I know it's hard, but just being grateful for the good things in your life you can find that alone really helps a lot. Look, I had 2 brain tumor surgeries, and I had seizures all while I was the single mother of an infant daughter, and I couldn't even work and was getting denied a lot from SSD. Over the many years, everything came together and me and my daughter are fine now. Not exactly where we want to be, but we are fine. Life is so full of ups and downs, and, unfortunately, we get a lot of downs, but those too shall pass. Good luck, write whenever you want.
GreenEyes727
GreenEyes727
Carol, that is a great idea about the cat. I guess you could always take an Uber to the vet. I have had many cats too. I am sorry that you are so alone in this world. Have you tried dating yet? I am sorry about your husband. I am sure that he wouldn't want you to be lonely. There are free dating apps. I broke up with a guy in 1995, dated one guy in 1998 who used me to watch his kids while he did drugs so I don't count him. So I've been alone ever since. As of January 1st, I went on a diet. I feel like I am in control. I have to lose 75 pounds. I refuse to let any excuses get in the way. Are you on Facebook? I have reconnected with many people through Facebook. Well, I hope you find ways to be less lonely. If you like musicians who play the piano, I could introduce you to some great artists.
Anna1212
Anna1212
I didn't have a car for four years and took my cats to the vet in cabs when necessary. It's a pain but possible. It's nice to have an animal. I can relate to almost everything you describe. when I was without heat for many years I used to put two space heaters in my small bedroom so at least one room would be warm and I could hang out in there. Bad knee is hard. Sometimes I wrap mine in ace bandage if they're really acting up or just rest with my legs up. I'm very short on money so I started making my own bread and trying to figure out money saving stuff like clipping digital coupons, extreme meal planning, etc. I find it kind of fun. Hang in there. You're not alone if having lots of struggles. Hugs.
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