Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hey everyone. I haven't been on the boards for ages...probably a good four months at least.
For quite some time I was doing a lot better, but recently i've been feeling things spiraling out of control again. I've gone down drastically on my medicine which likely has much to do with it, not to mention I have been dealing off and on with a persistent upset stomach.
I've just started having anxiety attacks again (which I haven't had in a LONG time) and am having wild mood swings where I just go into hysterical crying fits where I start screaming and punching the wall.
As all of my old friends know, I am a musician and it is still hard as hell for me to write anything. Thankfully, I have been on the ball with writing, but I am VERY overly critical about everything I write. I feel like I a not satisfied with my music and, as stupid as it may sound, after writing something I will often get so dissatisfied that I will want to self harm (don't worry. I don't...just get the urge). I know it seems childish and self centered, but not being satisfied in my music makes me feel like a failure and it seems to be the only thing I ever think about.
Although I have a supportive husband, there is only so much he can take at a time and he often becomes frustrated with me. This causes many screaming matches which leads to guilt and embarassment.
Sorry if that was a long post, but it's been a long time since I have been on here. I guess I just need someone to talk to and rant a bit instead of just going off on my husband all the time. I don't see a therapist, so I just need someone to talk to.
For quite some time I was doing a lot better, but recently i've been feeling things spiraling out of control again. I've gone down drastically on my medicine which likely has much to do with it, not to mention I have been dealing off and on with a persistent upset stomach.
I've just started having anxiety attacks again (which I haven't had in a LONG time) and am having wild mood swings where I just go into hysterical crying fits where I start screaming and punching the wall.
As all of my old friends know, I am a musician and it is still hard as hell for me to write anything. Thankfully, I have been on the ball with writing, but I am VERY overly critical about everything I write. I feel like I a not satisfied with my music and, as stupid as it may sound, after writing something I will often get so dissatisfied that I will want to self harm (don't worry. I don't...just get the urge). I know it seems childish and self centered, but not being satisfied in my music makes me feel like a failure and it seems to be the only thing I ever think about.
Although I have a supportive husband, there is only so much he can take at a time and he often becomes frustrated with me. This causes many screaming matches which leads to guilt and embarassment.
Sorry if that was a long post, but it's been a long time since I have been on here. I guess I just need someone to talk to and rant a bit instead of just going off on my husband all the time. I don't see a therapist, so I just need someone to talk to.
deleted_user
Kuno, I am a full believer in that you need to take care of yourself before you can take care of another IE-- a child. If you haven't dealt with your depression and other issues that put you on these meds to begin with, I would hesitate becoming pregnant. Plus pregnancy brings in all kinds of hormones that can mess with your emotions and you would be of high risk of post partum depression. If your psychiatrist is against you going down on your meds, maybe you should reconsider. Good luck in whatever you choose & take care.
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