Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Mental Health
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I Hate This Part Right Here

Underland
Underland

I am absolutely hating my life right now. Not a surprise really.. It's been this way for awhile. I got married in November and my husband is not exactly the ideal type to help with my depression; Military man, quick to temper, quick to judge, quick to lash out. Sometimes i wonder if it was a mistake. sometimes i wonder if living was a mistake... im in a dark abyss of dispair that i can never crawl out of. I failed all of my classes this semester... again.... i cant bring myself to do anything right apparently. I don't get told it but i might as well be told that i am worthless. I can't find a job, i don't care(even when i do), i cant clean the house, i can't do anything right... why do i exist? why do i exist if i cant even.... accomplish anything..... i hate my life. i hate that i cant do anthing right... i hate me..

rcurtis1010
rcurtis1010
I'm so sorry that you feel this way.. Have you tried talking to anyone professional about your feelings?? Tried taking medication at all or just simply seeking help from people in your life that do understand?? I know it can be extremely tough. Just know people care about you <3 if you ever just need to talk my inbox is always open.
CrazyGoatLady
CrazyGoatLady
I am so sorry you are having such a horrible day. I too have horrible days. I do have good days too fortunately and I find it is important to remember that on the bad days. For me, in my experience,(and yours may be different). But depression lies to me, it tells me those horrible things like worthless and doing everything wrong- but they are lies! I am worthy and it is ok to accept myself and the bad days and move on. You reached out so that means you do know you can and will feel better. Go to your list of self-soothing go to, music and comedy/laughter are a couple of mine. It's amazing how quickly alittle music brings about a change in thoughts. Best wishes.
shadowlady
shadowlady
I'm so sorry. Prayers.
peterthegreat
peterthegreat
Find a mentor.
Ninja_Tonks
Ninja_Tonks
Underland, you are not worthless. Your struggle isn't you. It's a disease. Beyond the depression is the real you, and the real you can accomplish things. Also, we can't judge ourselves by accomplishments too much. Give yourself some credit--you are trying.

Having an unhelpful/misunderstanding partner is a HUGE issue. Is he aware that he misunderstands, and is he interested at all in learning to understand what you are going through? Very serious questions when considering if this is a healthy relationship for you. Would he be interested in couples therapy? Also a huge question to ask. And before you tackle that entirely life-changing question, everything else is on halt. How can you focus on school when the direction of your life hangs in the balance?

I am sorry you have to go through this. I have recently been asking myself really difficult questions about where I'm at in life. And I keep trying to throw myself at a challenge or accomplishment, only to realize I can't do those things until I tackle these really tough questions about where I need to be. But, in my darkest times, I have to believe that my best self is still out there somewhere and I can find it. Even if you can't conceive of a better future or a path forward, please believe that one exists. Hold onto every thread of hope. You will get through this. Keep me updated!
Community LeaderWanderingVet
WanderingVet
This is what spousal abuse can do to a person.
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