I"m not sure if you've done any research on Depression, but it would probably be a good idea to educate yourself. Depression affects everyone differently but generally when in a Depressed cycle you have symptoms of fatigue, either sleep too much or have trouble sleeping. No desire to do anything really, just a lack of "want to", Persona hygiene usually suffers because of the lack of "want to"...you just don't really care about anything. The cycle is usually progressively worse, it starts, gets more severe, and without treatment, i.e. medication and therapy it can be hard to pull out of it.

The Anxiety usually comes from the feelings of helplessness and loss of control as the Depression takes over and you can't fight through it. Depression is a very powerful beast, it can take over very quickly and consume you completely.

I'm BiPolar so I have a more serious type of Depression, generally a more deadly type of Depression. But I"ve been BiPolar for 30 years and I've had very extreme treatments and have learned Coping and Behavioral Skills that work with the right Medication Cocktail to allow me to manage my Mental Health and be Stable.

Keeping a nightly routine sleep schedule is important, leaving distractions out of the bedroom, i.e. TV's, phones, PC's, etc. No bright lights, loud noises. Sleep Hygiene is important. Eating healthy is important, limiting sugar, junk food, processed foods. Getting exercise and sunshine each day, sunshine is the best source of Vitamin D and Vitamin D helps fight Depression. Trying to live as healthy as you can will help you a lot.

"Normal" is a word that you don't want to focus on too much when you're learning to manage your Mental Health, everyone is different. Focus more on Stable and Healthy. With the right Medication, Therapies and Coping Skills you can learn how to identify your Triggers, see the Depression coming and learn to manage it. Living a healthy, stable life with Depression and Anxiety should be the goal for your new regular life. Accepting that this is a change and it will take some hard work to manage it is a pretty big step....being concerned about getting back to "normal" will just make you more anxious and keep the Depression around.

Take care,

OlderCPer said it all wonderfully.
Just want to emphasize too to do stretching routines especially ones to open
the hip flexors open,Keep your chakras open,See situations that arise as being
outside yourself not part of yourself and try to develop a regimen of
a disciplined mental the same as a disciplined lifestyle,
Peace Love Light!!!

Couldn't have said it any better than OlderCper!

Depression and anxiety has affected me in so many ways. It consumed my entire being till this day. I used to be a very athletic person. I played volleyball for 4 years and trained outside of school. I was nominated athlete of the year too as well. I went from being a passionate athlete living a healthy lifestyle to a person I don't recognize anymore. I had plans to play volleyball in college and university while studying psychology.

After high school, things spiraled downwards. I stopped playing sports and became completely sedentary. I dropped out of college after two weeks of going and left my summer job. I didn't care about my health and gained 15-20lbs.

I experience difficulty sleeping at night. Constantly waking up at night and having a hard time going to sleep and falling back to sleep every night. I used to be able to crash on my bed and fall sleep within minutes.

I now have very low self esteem and lack confidence. I was always a shy/introverted person but even then I could still manage to socialize and be around people. Now I dread going out and can't keep a conversation going. I am very anxious and awkward in social surroundings. I barely had a social life the last few years. It's weird because I wasn't like this at all. I've turned down seeing family and hanging with friends numerous times. I can't make friends and feel disconnected with the world.

I also lost interest/pleasure in things I used to be passionate about. I don't care about anything anymore.
Nothing brings me a sense of pleasure or joy. I feel numb and empty.

I always feel lethargic, drained/fatigue doing little to nothing at all. Even just thinking can be exhausting.

I also feel very anxious. I used to just be depressed then anxiety came a long. I'm in a constant of fear and distress. It never goes away. I am always think, worrying and stressing about anything and everything. It is absolutely ridiculous. I have persistent feelings of dread and angst. A lot of the times, I feel it in my body. I feel agitated and restless. I can't shut my brain off or relax my body.
These feelings persist all day and drive me nuts. I feel like banging my head against a wall.

I've also had problems with binge eating. It was a coping mechanism. I'm an emotional eater and that's how I gained the weight.
The only thing that could make me happy for a few seconds was eating. So I would always eat my feelings away to chase that 10 seconds of happiness. But afterwards I would feel like absolute shit and felt like I've lost control of myself.

I also experience difficulty concentrating. I kid you not. I can't focus on anything for ten minutes. I have a really really hard time listening to my friends talks, reading a paragraph or even watching an episode on Netflix. Whenever I turn the TV, I try my hardest to watch whatever is on but I never seem to pay attention. I can't listen to anything or anything for barely 10 minutes. I'm always lost in my thoughts.


Something I also deal with is the inability to relax. My brain will not shut off. It is always on. All these negative thoughts racing through my mind. I'm always arguing with myself in my head.
Because of that I will always sleep because it's the only wait I know how to quiet my mind.

last , I sometimes get angry. I get easily triggered by little things. I'll feel like wanting to punch someone when they make comments that would really hurt my feelings. It's hard to explain but have you ever felt really insecure about something and when someone points it out you just feel like crawling in a dark hole and never coming out or when they take you're feelings lightly and make fun of you , you just wanna go jump off a building. It's hard to explain.

In short I've experienced

- increase appetite/weight gain
- difficulty concentrating
- difficulty sleeping
- persistent feelings of angst/distress
- suicidal thoughts
- lack of self esteem/low confidence
- lethargy/ extreme fatigue
- withdrawal from social gatherings
- lost of interest in things I used to love doing
- in extreme case of major depression/suicidal episodes I suffer from poor hygiene as much as I hate to admit
- negative mindset
- can't function , do normal daily tasks

I'm sure I've missed a few things but those are the main symptoms.

I still have yet to get help and learn about depression and anxiety itself. Best of luck to you!

Also, I didnt mean to make this post all about me. I feel like I sound ungrateful or selfish I don't know how to put into words what I meant lol... Maybe I overshared too much now that I look back.

I would like to give you advice but I'm in no position to do so I just want to wish you the best in your recovery. I send you love , light and strength that I don't really have but somewhat kinda have haha. I don't know how to express wishing you the best dealing with your depression and anxiety. I guess being out of school for 2 years and barely going out to socialise does that. I just want express my support that I also kinda need too lol I'm just laughing at myself because I want to be nice and show support by giving advice but I can't really do that either because struggling too. Ignore this lol

Thank you OlderCPe. I have read the basic articles on it. Anxiety I know pretty well, as many of my friends and family members suffer from that...but depression I'm still learning about. It all started off of fatigue after the New Years.

I too like you Skylar Winter was pretty active. I went to the gym 3-5 days a week for about an hour each time, socialized, and went out. But I started getting very tired...get to the gym and got dizzy or no energy. Then I could fall asleep but always woke up in the middle of the night and could not fall back to sleep. I found myself sleeping less and less.

Then my thinking....it was like a change over night...brain fog...couldn't find words...recalling things...and I'm normally very quick thinking and verbal...very unlike me. I couldn't pay attention...whatever I read I couldn't process like I normally would. It was like my brain slowed down.

I never experienced anything like it before...and it got progressively worst over a month...the fatigue set in...and I found it difficult to just do everyday things without needing breaks and wanting to lay down.

This made me panic and sent me to my doctor to test for all sorts of things. He gave me antidepressants which made me even more tired...helped me not care about anything and with my anxiety...but I couldn't handle the extreme fatigue.

So after about 8 days I got off them and taking some supplements that also help with serotonin levels, started building up my stamina by taking small walks each day...and it's helped. Spending more time outside, reconnecting with friends...and making myself do things that I use to do. I eat extremely clean, lots of antioxidants.

Skylar...what you wrote was just perfect! Normally it just says fatigue as a symptom...but that can mean many different things to many different people. You gave me examples of your day to day life...and how it changed...and that is exactly what I wanted to know!

So much of what you said hit home! I just didn't know it at the time.

Thank you for your personal story...because it really has helped me. You are not giving advice...you're sharing your story and what's working for you...and that's empathy, compassion, and support.

Thank you all!

SkylarWinter:

When you're getting treatment for a Mental Illness it needs to come from a Psychiatrist (Pdoc). Medical Dr.'s are great at what they do, but they do not have the training or understanding of how to properly treat Mental Health issues. 90% of the time they decide on giving out Anti-Depressants or Anti-Anxiety meds based on which drug Rep. brought them the newest samples. And not using the right medications can make things much worse. I have no problem with Medical Dr.'s, I use many of them as a person with a Seizure Disorder, Chronic Migraines, Liver Disease, Kidney Disease, Degenerative Cartilage Disease, Osteoarthritis and Atelectasis (lung condition) I have many Specialists but I would never go to my Ortho Surgeon for my Lung Condition....and I don't go to my PCP for my Mental Health. Yeah I have a crapass body! lol

For the past 30 years, not a day has passed that I've not been under the care of a Pdoc, because not a day has passed that I've not been on meds to manage my BiPolar Disorder. So, please consider seeing a Pdoc to manage your Mental Health. There are very good Anti-Depressants out there that do not make you tired or fatigued or have tons of side effects.

The type of Depression I have is different than yours, in that its BiPolar Depression. So, I've had 5 In-patient Psych stays over 30 years for 5 Suicide attempts because when my Depression was at its worst, all my brain wanted to be was dead. In 2010 I'd become medication resistant, meaning I'd been on so many psych medications over the previous 20 years that nothing worked anymore. I had no will to live, no want to do anything, no desire to exist. My oldest son who was then 19, talked me into going into the Hospital, the same Hospital I'd been in previously 3 times before, same University Hospital System I'd been connected too Professionally before I retired from the Mental Health field a couple years earlier. I spent 2 weeks meeting with my Pdoc and the Hospital Pdocs discussing treatment options and we decided there was only 1 left. I then underwent 14 weeks of ECT (Electroconvulsive Therapy) 3 times a week, every week for 14 weeks.

Its what we call an "endgame" treatment because there was nothing else left to try. But after 3 months of hell, I got my life back, my brain "re-set" and responded to meds again, my Depressive episodes became mild to semi-moderate, and I hit Stable. I've been divorced for 10 years, my very happy choice, I've watched my sons turn into men, and I'm semi-retired. I still deal with Depression but it's mainly in the winter and early spring and I know my triggers and how to manage it. I spend a little time working and a lot of time volunteering. I've found that helping others, tends to make me feel like my problems are not as big as I think they are.

So, I hope that you find a good Pdoc and let them help you with the right meds and the right mix of therapy and coping skills, because life with Anxiety and Depression is manageable and you can live it. Learning relaxation and deep breathing therapies can be great treatments for Anxiety, that's how I deal with mine when it rears its ugly lil head.

Take care,

Kat

what skylarwinter said in reply was spot on and describes my depression symptoms perfectly. I have been on anti depressant medication for about a week but so far it hasn't done much. My main difference is my mouth feels dry all the time and food hasn't got much taste and I have to force myself to eat otherwise I wouldn't eat at all.
Also I feel cold all of the time (especially my feet) so I spend a lot of time in bed with the electric blanket on as I try to warm up. I'm also on sleeping medication but I wake up feeling groggy - even if I have had a good night's sleep. Has anyone else experienced these symptoms?

Yes Roger! Dry mouth was a big problem for me...bc it woke me up in the middle of the night. I know they say drink lots of water...but what helped me was just keeping a piece of gum in my mouth. I know there are some antidepressants that cause sweating or chills...if the symptoms are more unbearable than the benefit, definitely let him know. I think they say...sometimes give it a 2 weeks to let the side effects subside...but that's up to you. If you're always cold...you might want to have your iron levels check. That was the cause of me being cold all the time. Also try to have a few short walks a day...I'm talking like 5 minutes...even if it's just in your house in bw the hall ways.. It will help with your circulation.

A lot of you hit the points perfectly!

For me I'll do well for quite a while then all of a sudden it will hit me and I just have to let it pass, like yesterday. It's still with me a little today, but you get through it. Also staying in routine as much as you can will help as well, then you know what to expect etc. I'm here anytime!

I just shut down... I can't concentrate or function. I get overwhelmed so easily that I just break down and cry at the smallest things ie two people talking to me at the same time. I also have a heavy increased heartrate and I can't sleep yet I'm shattered all the time.