I'm trying. I just have a lot on my list and I can't take it. I wrote down things that are bothering me and I'm seeing my councilor Tuesday. I gave my Mom the pills and the knife. So there's a start I guess.

Life is an amazing and wonderful gift. Every new day is another chance to start over fresh.
You've been sold a phony bill of goods that has you convinced you're not important,,,WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP!!!! EVERY LIFE is important. You have so much to give to the world. Just think, you might be the one that brightens someone's day by just saying "hello". Or you may make a contribution to science or society. The possibilities are endless.
Don't quit! GET SOME HELP and press on. Believe me, the world is waiting for you.

I've been in this situation afew times. Deep down I didn't want to die because I love my family even though they can be horrible bastards. I have 3 little sisters that I love to pieces. I can't leave them. They'd be heartbroken. And 2 dogs that I love so much. We are all loved. You remember that when you're feeling down

PLEASE STOP for just a moment. You are so far down the "rabbit hole" to think clearly. I've been here SO many times. Life IS CHANGE! Whether you feel it right now or not - YOUR STORY MATTERS! You are living a story each day of your life and though it is HARD right now - there are many chapters to come. Do Not Let A Temporary Feeling Lead You To A Permanent Decision!!

im doing the same thing

I'm trying really am. I'm having a ok day right now. I'm just so tired of my darkest days. I did give my Mom the knife and pills. So I am trying.

Good for you--you are doing great!

I mean that very sincerely. You have taken several big steps in the right direction. Feel good about that.

Yeah? I feel like I should of never given her them. It's hard to go to parties and everyone is happy and your in your thoughts and not thinking right.

You don’t know me Emily and I don’t know you but your post hurt me very much. I don’t want you to die. I’m crying as I type this because I can just feel that you are a good person and you have a lot to offer but are just conflicted. I get it. I am too. So we end our life? That’s the answer? What does that do? Cause our love ones and those who have known us, pain and depression. What does it do for us? Absolutely nothing but stop us in our tracks from achieving who knows what.

I could write you a book because that’s what I do. I’m a writer. But I don’t need to do that because it’s clear how much love has been sent your way. I need you to snap out of your funk and realize your potential. It’s not going to happen right away, but everyday work at what you love and then go after it until you are able to wake up and smile knowing you are happy because the days brings on a new challenge. Death is inevitable for all of us but please don’t make it easy for him by taking your own life prematurely.

Just know Emily, every single person matters. Some don’t know why they do, I say to all those people you aren’t doing what you love every day, once you find and do that, you’ll understand your purpose. I once knew a man that was a janitor for 32 years. He was happy as it provided for his family. Did he love it? Not necessarily, but knowing his family was happy, healthy and able to get better opportunities than he had, he kept that in mind every day and retired proud of the 32 years he served as what he titled “custodian.”

The moral of his story is, when you find a reason to live life gets easier to love. Right now, you’re thinking you have no reason, but that’s because you are not challenging yourself enough. Read more, be more social. Go to a library or bookstore, coffee shop, juice bar whatever it takes to meet more people listen to their stories and learn to create your own.

I believe in you Emily, I send my love to you Emily, and although I keep faith to each person that learns their way, you are in my prayers, Emily! Love and Peace!

Emily, sweetheart, I agree with all of the previous posts. Please realize that you're very important to the plan of God. He loves you and so do I. I'll be praying for you.

I’m sorry for however you’re feeling but don’t do it! It’s not the right thing to do, you have so many options other than that, and everyone is here for you! Hang in there my friend. ((((Hugs))))

Thank you everyone and it's just hard to go each day with such darkness. With a few things you guys said that I've done my councilor is also proud. I feel like these hiccups are the hardest. Yes I cut and I do feel like jumping and hanging from the tree. And yes I'll be happy but I also know my Mom will be upset and disappointed. Her only child wants to end her life but I do want to try but this hole I am in is closing and it's hard.

Sorry to go on and on and keep wasting each of your time I'm sorry.

Anytime you feel down or in need of talking, that’s what this site is for! Don’t ever feel like you are wasting any of our time. Anyone on here is either here for support or here to support so let it all out Emily! We are happy to listen and help you any way we possibly can!

The Devil is a Lie!!! I pray that that spirit will be bound up and cast into the sea of forgetfulness.