Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
So I am attempting to change careers. I was a schoolteacher for a very long time. I was good at it but the bad behavior and chaos at school really got to me, so I went back for my master's. It's a facet of software development, so a total pivot if there ever was one. It's hard and I'm enjoying it, but I'm really starting to question myself.
I'm doing a summer project with a professor and a team, with two other computer science students, software developers. I draw visual designs and do some content development but I don't write code.
It's hard to explain, but to make a long story short I have spent the summer working for free spending many hours perfecting a visual design for a custom mobile app based upon the existing framework. The issue is one of the software developers seems over invested and has virtually taken over the project. What I thought was going to happen was that they would write the code for a design I bullt for them. As it turns out, this developer has introduced a pre-built solution, much like Wix, a sort of plug and play thing. When we come to the meetings he talks for the entire hour. I can't even participate. He is not the supervisor but I was feeling really angry and upset. I was asked by the professor and the stakeholder (the people for whom we are building the design) to do this. it's pro-bono. They asked for specific colors and features, and it's phone iphone basically. This guy introduced this desktop thing that obliterates the need for me even building a custom app for them at all. I turned down a paid job teaching summer school to do this.
I don't know if this is how it really goes in the workforce, but I'm pretty upset. I start to wonder sometimes if I picked the wrong path and should have just stayed a teacher, IDK. I have double the amount of student loans now and am doing this free internship in lieu of making money as a summer school teacher, which really irritates me. I don't have to continue doing the project. Ironically I'm looking forward back to substitute teaching starting in the fall as it gets me out of the house. The current work is very isolating. I was so upset today I almost just left the virtual meeing without saying goodbye. You can't do that though, it's unprofessional. I did speak up and express that I'm not clear on the role or need for me if they are going to use a pre-set thing. I think after I finish building out the designs and we present it in two weeks to the customer, I will end my involvement with the project then. It is only for the summer. I guess the customer will choose but I didn't expect another student to take over the entire project and eclipse everyone. Even the professor said, "you are pushing this on us."
Well maybe welcome to the real world. I've sat in many meetings with parents and students that got tense. I suppose that could go for all professions. There is a paid opportunity to work in ed tech as an intern, which is my long-term goal, and the position opens now. I was putting off applying becuase of this project, but I dont' think I'm going to put it off anymore.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
I can tell you what it's like on the job. Software developers do actually code. The design stuff that you are doing is more what a UX/UI expert does.
Actual software development does not utilize any Wix style solutions. They are used more for small businesses which makes sense if you are doing pro-bono work.
In terms of people like him on the job? Yes they exist. Most people are *not* like that. Most software engineers are actually very friendly and gracious with their time. But in my experience there is usually some young inexperienced man who thinks he is a hotshot who has all of the answers. And everyone hates him lol.
But no one would be able to dominate like that in a meeting on the job. They'd shut that shit down. But it also depends on the company. Small companies tend to be more dysfunctional than large companies. I've only worked for large companies.
There are a ton of roles in tech that don't require coding. UX, systems engineer, product owner, scrum master, etc. A lot of these people are afraid to code lol.
But if you wanted to code don't be intimidated. It takes years of working on the job to be good at it. Your brain is learning new ways to think.
Maybe create a small website to showcase your work like a live resume
Secondly, you were a teacher and used to pretty much owning your classroom. There were lots of rules you had to follow but you were in charge. You were important in that classroom, the kids looked up to you. You managed it all, you lined them up or dismissed them when the bell rang, etc.
In a new job, you won't be in charge. You will be "the low man on the totem pole" at your first IT job and maybe even at your second IT job. Others will be in charge of the office, and you may chafe at having once been an independent worker so to speak in the classroom. You decorated it, you arranged the chairs, you kept order or discipline. Next job will just be you doing the work others give you and them likely not listening to your input.
I was once a very independent worker and I got burned out of the 24/7 nature of that job. I went to working in legal offices and boy did I find out what being treated like poop was like. Lowest worker in the department and that meant I didn't matter. Then the Great Recession hit and I had several short term jobs where I was pretty much independent at an office doing the job they gave me. I finally got what I thought was a great job with promotion ability and found out no, the CEO thought people doing my type of job were expendable and didn't matter. I realized I had been too independent for too long to enjoy being just a grunt treated as not important.
As for your student loan debt, get that paid off. It is an albatross around your neck forever affecting your ability to buy a house, save for retirement, etc. I don't know why colleges don't make students take a financial class about the oppression of student loans. I know the students think this is the only way. My masters cost me $30,000 out of my retirement savings. Later I thought I kind of wasted my money maybe. Lot of money that may or may not bring financial security. I am sorry to be negative. Best wishes to you!