Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I hate my life so much. I can't stand working but have no choice.
If I quit my job I'll be homeless with in two weeks as I live in a
weekly rental apt. I'd rather be dead than homeless again. Hell,
I'd rather be dead period.
I have a lot of pills saved up and think they might be enough to
kill me. I just have to get up the guts to do it. I've been holding
on for so long, 52 years, waiting for someone to love and care
for me. But that isn't going to happen. So it's time to end it.
If I quit my job I'll be homeless with in two weeks as I live in a
weekly rental apt. I'd rather be dead than homeless again. Hell,
I'd rather be dead period.
I have a lot of pills saved up and think they might be enough to
kill me. I just have to get up the guts to do it. I've been holding
on for so long, 52 years, waiting for someone to love and care
for me. But that isn't going to happen. So it's time to end it.
There are a lot of people who could do with your help, and you could reach out to them. And it could bring you grateful friends and well wishers. People do care, just give them a little chance.
Its easy to give up. You would be wasting so much potential.
Its much more sporting to try to WIN over all your odds.
You Are Extremely Precious To Me And Many Others.
Sending Love And (((((((HUGS))))))) And More Love
* We all get bad times, not just you. It is how you come with it that counts. Some of us are proactive, for example, if they hate their job they learn new skills or get a better education and/or change their job. I used to hate my job but I studied and studied and trained and learnt and set up my own business. You could learn how to make websites and do that from your own place self employed, there are lots of things you can do, but simply leaving things as they are and then moaning about them is useless.
* A partner cannot come along and sooth you into feeling happy and safe. A partner who is happy and safe will not want to take on all of your pain and become your saviour. If they are in a good place they will want it to stay that way. That means having a trouble free life with no stress, not taking on the stress of a stranger.
You have to learn how to handle your own feelings and stress before you can help anyone else with theirs.
I have met a lot of women who get it into their head that a man will come along and save them from unhappiness. One lady bluntly told me that she wanted a guy to come along so that he would pay her debts, pay her bills, sort out her house, decorate it, give her lifts to the doctors and shops, mow the lawn and wash the windows. But it never occurred to her that a guy who has worked hard and saved and taken care of himself so that he does not have problems would run a mile from this and he could easily get a woman who is the same as him - happy and problem free. Nobody is going to choose her as an act of charity, she has to have as much to offer in return.
* Stop concentrating on yourself and how you feel. If you are going to spend a whole evening thinking about YOU and how awful you feel you are just winding yourself up. If you spend the same amount of time on asking other people how they feel and what you can do to cheer them up at least that time was not wasted.
I used to get nights where I was awake all night unable to sleep or relax- I felt awful both physically and emotionally. So I worked on a suicide line talking to people about them and how they felt rather than dwelling on me and feeling self pity. And by doing instead of dwelling on my negative thoughts I did not wind myself up feeling worse.
when I have more pills to ensure I have enough. It's not the job that
is so bad, it's having to work at all. I'm sick and shouldn't have to
work at all. I realize no one is going to come along and help me.
I've been waiting to long for that. It's horribly sad. I should have
been taken care of when I was a child, then I wouldn't be looking
for the care I didn't get. But god wanted me to have a horrible life
and made sure of it by giving me to monstrous parents. I will quit
my job and wait till I get more pills and an eviction notice, then I
will end it. Life is just too painful to think about going on for years.
((((gentle hugs))))
I know there is no way to ensure I will be successful with the pills. I think about buying a gun but would rather pass away peacefully.
No one seems to understand how hellish the last 52 fucking years have been. How excruciatingly painful existence is.
I have no one in my life who cares about me. I will leave a note for the police to contact my boss at work. She is the only person I know. And I barely know her, but I just want someone to know I died.
I really don't understand why people aren't more supportive of me ending my misery. Do they really not understand the depth of pain a person can be in? If I was a dog I'd be put to sleep peacefully. But because I'm human I'm expected to suffer as long as possible.
I'm tired of ranting on DS, just as I'm sure people are tired of hearing me rant. I know there is nothing anyone can do for me other than listen. But it must get hard to listen to after a while. So I'd like to take the time to thank everyone who responded to my posts. I know they were just screams of pain and hard to hear.
Thank you everyone.
There are a million people who are worse off than you. Look at some videos of people whose countries are at war, for instance.Look at people living with dictatorial governments. At least you live in a free country and you have choices.
Get in touch with DS members you feel close to. PM us. Share your pain. Sorrow shared is sorrow halved.
Do not be unsporting and take the easy way out. Life is a game, PLAY IT!
I understand you, so very well. I'm not doing so bad at the moment, but I'm still planning for a way out in the future, it's what keeps me alive. I know, contradictory bollocks, but I'm sure you understand me too.
It's not hard to listen to you because it's all we can do. I would listen to you for as long as you need it when I'm on here, because you deserve to have your feelings validated. I completely believe that you want to die, and that you want us to support you in your actions. Seeing your pain and supporting you in your decision are two different things, and much as I know how much you want to do it, I can't support it. That's because you are ILL, and if someone with cancer said to me "I want to die now, even though there's a chance I could get better" I would beg them not to do it.
I wish so much the system was in place to support you. In the UK we moan about our NHS, but it's there for us when we really need it. I don't know how support works where you are, but it's a cruel world that fails to recognise your need.
If you feel the need to get up the courage to do it, it means that somewhere deep inside you still have a tiny glimmer of hope. Hold on to that, and the love we have for you, and keep on keeping on. I admire you so much for going in to work every day, and maybe you could talk to your boss about how bad you feel. Don't give up my friend.