Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
If anyone remembers my post from a few weeks before, I tried giving myself a two drink maximum per day. Well, that failed.
I don't know why, but it seems like my past tolerance to alcohol has changed. Now, as little as one drink will leave me drunk.
Yesterday, I actually blacked out and ended up having an extra drink. I don't even remember pouring myself another drink, but my husband claims that I did and ended up vomiting afterwards.
It scares me that I do not remember pouring this extra drink, although I do vaguely remember getting sick last night.
This morning I feel horrible. I am hung over and shaking, but I still need to go to work 2 till 9.
It's bullshit. I feel compelled to drink to calm myself down, but then I just end up having panic attacks because of the drinking. According to my husband, I have been getting CRAZY when I drink, and I am scaring the hell out of him. It makes me feel guilty that I am making him feel that way.
I am swearing off of drinking for at least two weeks. I know it sounds stupid that I will likely just go back to drinking after the two weeks is up, but who knows. Maybe i'll start feeling better and end up quitting.
I don't know why, but it seems like my past tolerance to alcohol has changed. Now, as little as one drink will leave me drunk.
Yesterday, I actually blacked out and ended up having an extra drink. I don't even remember pouring myself another drink, but my husband claims that I did and ended up vomiting afterwards.
It scares me that I do not remember pouring this extra drink, although I do vaguely remember getting sick last night.
This morning I feel horrible. I am hung over and shaking, but I still need to go to work 2 till 9.
It's bullshit. I feel compelled to drink to calm myself down, but then I just end up having panic attacks because of the drinking. According to my husband, I have been getting CRAZY when I drink, and I am scaring the hell out of him. It makes me feel guilty that I am making him feel that way.
I am swearing off of drinking for at least two weeks. I know it sounds stupid that I will likely just go back to drinking after the two weeks is up, but who knows. Maybe i'll start feeling better and end up quitting.
Don't be scared. Talk to a doctor. Many people have gone through this before. You will get through this. I do believe that, sometimes, when I feel "uncomfortable", it means that a change is coming. I think this is a sign of a positive change. It's just uncomfortable now, but will get better in time.
It WILL get better.
I am having a really bad panic attack right now and I am afraid that it won't go away. As the day progresses, I feel worse.
I am pretty sure that on top of everything, I am sick. I always panic when I am ill. I just hope that all of this is over by tomorrow as I can not afford to miss another day of work.
I also feel like my cycle of panic might be back and it is terrorizing me.
Don't think I can ever forgive myself for the pain I cause my husband to go through, mainly with my panic disorder and OCD. I must make his life a living hell.
Still, I am angry at him for continuing to drink even after I got out of control. He very easily could have prevented me from going through the hell I am going through now, but I think he wanted to teach me a lesson and just not be a babysitter to me for once.
One day at a time!
But ofcourse you know that.. I hope you find the answers hon.. I am glad to be sober. Over two months now. Its been a tough road as I always used it to escape..Now I face my struggles without it.. I get stronger every day..
I used to have a huge tollerance, then all of a sudden I started getting drunk and sick after only one week. Anyway, I am DONE with alcohol, and I have my husband to help keep me sober.
Beastie- AWESOME NEWS! Stay strong!
As for AA, i'll be honest in saying that I have never believed in it. Much of it has to do with them claiming that alcoholism is something that one has no control over and that you must surrender to a higher power in order to get better. I take full responsibility for my actions and believe that only I alone can make myself quit.
I got myself in this same rut a number of years ago and I went cold turkey for two years without drinking along with my husband. Both of us have decided it is time to do the same once again.