I agree Elle. My dad passed away in December several years ago and it seems since then that Christmas has just been really hard and now this year is the first year without my father=in=law as well. It seems as if the family gets smaller and smaller. This time of year I think a lot of people fake their way through.

I'm sorry to hear that! That would be very difficult. I agree that people fake it. I'm trying my best to enjoy what I can and to stay positive. There are good things about Christmas no matter what your circumstances are, if you look hard enough. Hang in there.

You are so right, thanks!! I hope you have a very blessed holiday!!

I over spent this Christmas.....I am stressed because of money issues in life and this is just stupidity that I spent too much to get something for my Mom....I got her a snow blower because I will be using it if we get the snow.....it is for her house and I am really the one who would be removing any snow that she has removed...she has big driveway and long sidewalks....I paid on Credit card so it is buy now pay later....I think this year everything I bought everyone was on credit cards...uggh....

I think this year I am going to suggest a gift change in our habits to just put everyone's names in at say Halloween and draw one persons name for gifts....the stress is just too great on me to be buying family gifts....I get nice gifts from sisters and neice and nephews do not really put much effort into it as they are on tight budgets too.....

the dad passing away is something I had to deal with twice now...my grandpa died just before Christmas when I was younger maybe 13? and few years ago my BIL committed suicide in front of my sister the saturday before Christmas....it kind of left us like WTH>????

Oh man. Yea Christmas spending is always stressful. This year I probably overspent but it's the first year I actually had the money to do it. itll mean taking out of savings, but it's worth it to me. I'm laughing at myself for what I spent on my damn dog. ✋️ Christmas shouldn't be about the money or gifts, but about the feeling and family time together imo, but I fall victim to it every year.

I'm sorry to hear about your losses. Hang in there and try to remember it's the season of giving...which doesn't necessarily include cash. Some of my best gifts cost next to nothing except some creative thought. I'll take one of those over a material gift any day.

Christmas was always horrible for me, having to see family and fake it. Now I don't see them I just telephone them and I feel so much better. I take quite a bit of medication and that seems to get me through.

I am having a hard time this year. We do not have a lot and it is depressing me. We try to concentrate on what we do have. We also lost our car about a month and a half ago and that has been rough too. I am just trying to take one day at a time.

I've definitely faked it many times. This is the first year I have a valid excuse not to go but I feel sad I can't. Ironic right?

This is a time for financial stress, not just gifts but also in general. I sorry to hear about your car!

This can be a very difficult time financially and January is such a long month to get through.

I too have a hard time at Christmas, I try to be festive for my children and their families, but..... I'm stuck in December 21st 1992. When my first husband died, We had a good marriage, sure we had our troubles, but we worked on them together, yes, I suffered depression during that time, he wouldn't allow me to be on medications for it though, But Christmas was my favorite time of year, I'd go all out decorating, now I have a hard time even thinking about decorating, in 5 years I've had a tree up 2 times, the first time my Daughter-in-law made sure I decorated, and on December 26th I took everything down, this year I had my Grand daughter help decorate some, I never finished, and I wont.

Hi Elle. I've always enjoyed Christmas too and have mixed feelings this year due to diminished family. For you to love this holiday suggests have had some good Christmas's in the past, and that's a lot to be thankful for. When you've experienced happy content times as Christmas, it can be hard to live up to those expectations when circumstances. Now that your parents are divorcing, that comfort you felt in family has shifted. But they are still your parents, and I hope still there for you.

I'll be making my best efforts this year to work with what I have and to enjoy it as best I can. Fake it until I feel it. I hope you can too....but if you're really struggling, remember, by this time next week it'll all be over. That pressure is off and you can adjust to how family life will look after their divorce.

Sue...I'm sorry to hear how difficult things are for you around this time.

Hearing everyone else's struggles makes me thing mine are trivial, but I'm always under the impression that each persons own experience, regardless of the severity, can still be hard. I hope you all get thru this time smoothly and hang in there.

Amaranthine...thanks. I think I just assumed bc I'm an adult this wouldn't be as hard, but I feel like I'm a child when processing this. I keep thinking that my family is falling apart. It's difficult to try to be there for both of my parents. My mom refuses to discuss it, she says it's private and none of our business. I think she is trying to spare us the sad details but frankly I need information to process this. Just saying it's over and that's it doesn't work for me. I've tried to explain that but she doesn't seem to understand. My father is very upset and it kills me to know he's hurting so much. I feel as the oldest it is my job to make sure our family still has good times together. My sister and I have tried to make things as easy as possible. For thanksgiving I suggested a dinner w the kids for my dad the Tuesday before and that seemed to go well. I just can't seem to come to terms that it's over. And a part of me hates my mom for giving up. Then again I don't have all the information bc she won't tell me.

Every year we go to my moms side for Christmas Eve and then the next morning we go to my parents for immediate family. I knew this year would be hard with me working. I've never missed a Christmas. But this makes it even harder. I foresee me showing up later that week, passing out presents, and leaving. They didn't put up a tree or any decorations this year. Instead my mom served my dad w papers and had a guy come out to fix some things at the house so she can sell it asap. I love my mom, and she isn't a bad person, but she's acting like this isn't a big deal. It's killing me.

I'm just trying to process it and move forward. I can't control whether they are together or not. I can only be there for each on individually and try very hard to not have my heart filled w anger when this is a time for joy.