Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Broken..

ImEricc
ImEricc

Ill introduce myself first, I'm a 17 year old male senior, this website was referred to me by the 741 line so I thought it'd give me a shot since I messaged them 2 or 3 times a day. Long story short.. I've been dating this girl over a bit over two years, she moved a bit into the relationship and we kept going a LDR. We've been pretty happy for sometime until around 2 months ago. I tried to break up with her last Wednesday but she wouldn't let me saying she'll give me everything and she'll change. This is the second time she's down this, first time was 8 months into the relationship. But this Saturday she posts this selfie of a guy on her snapchat story and she hasn't replied to me in a bit over 6 hours so I call her several times expecting the worst outcome.. And a a few hours later she calls me explaining to me what's happened and she's been with this guy since Tuesday, the day before I tried to break up with her. She said they "really hit it off" when she was at work. And they've kissed before I called her. She's promised me so many things and said she'd change a lot of stuff for me. And this breakup really brought me down so I've stopped eating, not getting any sleep, throwing up several times and having bad thoughts. I was hoping anyone on this site could give me there time to keep myself busy and keep me from thinking about her, love meeting new people. Thanks guys.

Matthew89
Matthew89
Hello Eric. Welcome to the group. I'm sorry to hear about the situation with your girlfriend. That's got to be tough. Please don't take this the wrong way but why does it bother you that she's with a new guy now if you were going to break up with her anyways? If you want to talk about it, please feel free to message me.
ImEricc
ImEricc
I wanted to break up with her in first place because we weren't spending anymore time together, but then she said she'd change and give me everything she could.
Community LeaderThePepperMan
ThePepperMan
Hi Eric! welcome to DS. Lots of good people here.

I'm 63, so it has been quite some time since I was active in the dating scene. But, ... (and there is always a but isn't there?) ... , you don't need her permission to break up. Dating, no matter how close and intense, is not a legal relationship. People can terminate dating relationships for shallow reasons, complicated reasons, serious reasons, what ever reasons.

Look at the structure of the relationship. Can you get what you want from a LDR? Is what you want really the resumption of a geographically closer relationship?

Hard questions to ask at any age.

Gentle hugs
ImEricc
ImEricc
Thank you Pepper.
Dasani_Sun
Dasani_Sun
Hugs to you! I remember quite well how you are feeling, I had my heartbroken many times by my high school sweetheart. He cheated on me and I would say our unhealthy relationship was probably the start of my struggles with depression/low self esteem. I felt like my whole world was ending whenever he cheated on me. I was with him for many many years. He hurt me a lot and in return, I started hurting him (cheating in revenge) which made me feel like a horrible person. Looking back, I am ashamed of my behavior. I should have just moved forward and focused on learning to love myself. At 32, this is something I still struggle with....self love. So, my advice to you.....get out in the world and enjoy yourself as much as you can. You are young and have endless opportunities ahead of you. Find hobbies that you love, spend time with friends, make memories, travel any opportunity you get, and most importantly, work on bettering yourself and loving yourself. Before you are truly happy in a relationship, you have to know and love the person YOU are first. Hope this helps! Best wishes!
ImEricc
ImEricc
Thanks Dasani, your message helped!
brokenshards
brokenshards
Hey Eric,
I am so sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds like she really hurt you. If you ever need to talk to someone or just need a friend, please send me a message. I understand what it feels like to get your heart broken by someone and I promise you it's easier to get through it if you have support.
Love,
Catherine
Community Leaderbobinmaine
bobinmaine
If you wanted to break up with her to begin with then I don't understand why you are torturing yourself. It sounds like she is trying to get you back with this other relationship. Honestly, I think the best thing you could do would be to tell her you just want her to be happy and stop calling and texting her. Try to focus on developing other female friendships and you will be much happier in the long run. You have alot to offer women, so don't be afraid to start dating local girls again. Besides, LDR's rarely work!

God Bless
Melons135
Melons135
I believe its for the best and you'll be better off without her since it seems all she did was mess with your emotions and bring you down maybe staying away from relationships will give it time to heal I'm not sure if this is helpful
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