I just want to say I'm so sorry to hear about your dads death, please don't be scared that people will judge you, this site is full of people that are all going through the same things, we are here to support each other, not judge; I just realised I sound like a self help book, I'm really sorry for that :)
Look, I know it can be hard when you lose someone close to you and your brother is probably feeling just as sad as you; but don't be afraid to be upset, you crying with him may be just what he needs, it may just give him the reassurance that its okay to cry, its okay to be upset. Of course you know your brother better than anyone, and that may not be what he needs, if that's the case then don't bottle up your sadness, have a bath or wait until he is out of the room, or has gone to bed and just have a good cry to yourself; just let your emotions out in what ever way you can, the worst thing you can do is hold it in, even just try writing about your feelings, that's what I do since my nan died last year and sometimes it actually helps. I hope I have helped in someway, once again I am SO sorry for your loss and please don't be afraid of being judged xx

Having lost my own father eight years ago, I find it helps to just put yourself in a comfortable place and reflect. Let yourself grieve, but also allow yourself to go through the photographs and write about your good memories. There is nothing shameful about mourning.

we're here to help....hope your brother understands that his dad is in a nice place now and he is able to understand that afterlife we all know exists.....hugs

Glad you took this big step in sharing how you feel. I hope you'll feel comfortable enough to do more of it. I know it takes alot for me to share as well - I also fear being judged. But I've found people on DS to be so kind and caring. You're in a safe place here!

Kelbells, I totally empathize with you. My dad, and I'm 75 now, died when I was 5. I have no memories of him at all. He was supposed to have been a wonderful man, but my mother, etc. never mentioned him again. However, I think you are very strong and courageous to put your feelings into words when it doesn't come easily to you. Not only that, please make sure you pat yourself on the back for remaining strong and protective for your brother. But I do know one thing. If you are able, it is very healthy to express some of your emotions to him. Commiserate. I know, because my father was never mentioned again after his death and I believe it is one of many things that has greatly contributed to my lifelong depression. It is important to share your emotions together, even if it involves crying. It will be better for both of you in the long run. Don't pretend it never happened. It did. Hugs to both of you.