I don't think it's good to compare yourself to other people that way. Someone else's feelings don't make your feelings any less real. When you have to "let go" of the past it might be good to remember that it's not that black and white. The moment is gone but the memories might always stay. I have found that rather than moving away from something it's always better to move towards something. You're gonna have an x amount of thoughts every day. Try to make as many of them positive as you can. Keep track of your successes. You can literally write them down. Write down what makes you feel good. You can also write down what you were going through but only if you feel it helps you. You can be selfish now it's ok.

Yeah, it really is hard to find someone to understand. Letting go of the past is not easy too. We just keep trying to find a way out of all of this everyday. It really sucks to feel this lonely.

you don't ever compare yourself to others. you have your own set of issues, and they are just as big to you as others are to them. I get that its hard to talk to and trust people, but that's why we go to University for so long so that you have Psychiatrist and Psychologists/Therapists to talk to. So you have a totally unbiased source who only goes off of what you tell them. And if you learn to trust them and are honest and can build a healthy relationship with a Therapist, they can help you find ways to get you better. Their not judge and jury, they're there to help you figure out what's not working and then find a way to make it work.

..and you're not broken, your still feeling, your here writing, you're not broken. Journaling can help quite a bit, especially when you don't want to talk to a person. I'm hoping though that you find enough trust to see a Therapist and let them help you.

Take care,
Kat

I am so sorry that you're feeling so broken, and I'm so glad that you came here for some feedback. God loves you and you're not alone. We're listening and we hear you. Do you have anyone you can talk to face-to-face? Maybe a friend, a parent, a sibling? Or have you thought about seeking therapy? I think we all feel isolated sometimes. I will pray for you! Blessings.

Thank you everyone for the kind words. They are so appreciated.

Why me???

It's just life hun... Read much about human history???

Why do you think everyone want to be a billionaire king President???

So they can have an army to stop people harming them

Then loads of people treat you great cos they want your money and protection and the status to say to others I know the king (so watch out you better be good to me)

Other than that shit generally does just happen. Twelve steps of AA will try to show you some stuff you might be doing to cause negative consequences
Therapy might also give you some insight

Learning how to conform to group expectations and rules and to play dodge the scapegoat role helps. Usual tactics involve blaming someone innocent. Who doesn't blame someone else

I don't know, I've spent so long trying to figure out what my part in situations is. My general conclusion is that most people don't have good intentions and no intentions of co creating a happy abuse free environment for equals