I was diagnosed with a DVT after breaking my leg, it was considered a known cause between the break and hormonal birth control. I went on Xarelto for 6 months and was taken off afterward with no follow-up ultrasound. About a year later I felt a tug behind my knee and immediately panicked, went to my Primary Care doc who switched up my depression/anxiety med and sent me for an ultrasound. They picked up nothing of my previous clot which was in my left calf near my break but found "chronic thrombosis" behind my knee. I was put back on Xarelto and have now been going through a million tests with a hemotologist. Literally every test has come back negative and the doctor is at a loss as to the continuation of blood thinners or not. I have another ultrasound scheduled at the end of the month and then a followup with the doctor a week later. I can wrap my head around all of this, that there could be scaring from the first, etc. but subconsciously my mind is going a million miles a minute. I am convinced that I have developed another clot somewhere, some days I have anxiety and get a tight chest and convince myself I have a PE, other days I have a twinge in my leg and am convinced I have another clot there, somewhere worse, that it will move and kill me. I am still on Xarelto, and know that it is a small chance that I develop another one while on blood thinners, or that something will move, but there is a still a chance. I am anxious about the upcoming ultrasound showing clots, or that I will have something break free and kill me before I get to the ultrasound. I am just a mess and I hate it. I feel myself holding my leg differently, tensing it, checking it all the time, breathing deeply and rapidly, checking to make sure I can, in fact, breath. I am going to look for a psychologist to have face to face therapy and check those anxiety meds, but I am looking for some reassurance that I can, in fact, have a normal life and not be terrified of clots all the time.