I am still in this constant struggle to live my own life unenmeshed with my husband.
My husband does not want to do things with me. Every suggestion that I have he turns down unless it's watching a movie (where there's no interaction). We have no hobbies in common. There are things he likes to do that I will go do with him. They are not my first choice, but I will do those things because I enjoy being with him. He doesn't anything anymore even his own preferences. He has no desire to go out. He makes no plans other then maybe once a month he hangs out with a few friends. He doesn't talk to me much and doesn't want sex.
It sounds like he is depressed when I describe it and I have encouraged him many times that if he doesn't want to talk with me about it that he should seek a professional to at least get it out. He doesn't want to.
I don't want to sit around all the time doing nothing. We are having a bit of a difficult time right now financially because we both have some bills that need to be paid off, but we are both resourceful people. There are low cost and free activities that we could be doing.
I have things I like to do, I just don't want to do it alone. I don't want to live my life in solitude in a marriage. I can do that and not be married.
I know that the main part of codependency is focussing on making your own life better. I have activities that I know would greatly improve my social life and help to make some friends.
I also know I can't drag him forward into recovery with me. I want to get better and I want to improve my life, but I don't want to do it without him. I know where that leads. It will lead to us to splitting up because I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me.
my relationship with my partner when having major conflict/ disagreement goes like this :disagreement / conflict -1) he gets angry emotionally projects and can start shouting and talk about the same issue for ages .2)il listen speak up my point until I can’t anymore and cut the phone off avoid communication and cut calls .3)he emotionally over reacts to this will bombard with phone calls...