Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
What do you think about mixing friend groups? I would like to have a gathering with a couple of friend groups, I just don't know how it will work out. The groups are so much different from one another. Plus I have one friend who is extremely jealous and controlling. If I introduce her to my new friend that I am hiking with, she will likely be quite angry as I'm not hiking with her anymore. I have just felt over time I could barely do anything else in my life because I had to answer to her all of the time. She hates it when I have plans that might coincide on a day when she wants to do something-basically she's crazy in my opinion. I just worry if I have a party or something that she will try to annex my other friends and recruit them to her hiking group, and then I won't have an outlet outside of her anymore.
I don't know why I am going in circles like this, it isn't normal. In one group of friends, people are very uptight and have the tendency to be negative, and the other is much more fun. I hate to say it, but I hand out withe the 'fun' friends when I need a break from the draining ones. Sounds terrible. And I'm thinking if I combine them, then I all of them will be together and then I'll never have another outlet or a way to get a break from the drainers. Stupid mess.
I also put out a hint to a friend about my graduation date, I wasn't sure if I was issuing an official invitation, and now he's taking me seriously. It wasn't such a big deal the first time I graduated. My family was there an a couple of friends. Now I am stressing majorly about it. My brother's behavior is really bad, so I don't think I will invite him this time around. The crazy controlling friend is so uptight about the virus and I don't want that hindering my wgraduation day. I don't want to be worried about Covid when I am graduating. Oh who knows, I mean I wasn't invited to Friendsgiving this year, who knows if they will show to my graduation. IDK why my brain is going in cirlces and why I'm catastrophizing so much. I guess in the past I've had bad feelings about things and not followed that, like last Christmas when I felt I shouldn't go out of town with a particular friend and then it was an utter disaster, I didn't listen to my hesitation. Maybe that is what is happening here, IDK.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
Drop all those negative ones, high conflict ones. All these negative people do is make you feel like you have lots of friends but they are not friends. They are acquaintances. And the acquaintances don't really care about you. They will RSVP yes and not show. They will NOT be happy for you. Same with your family unfortunately. They are damaged and unhappy and we often love difficult people. But they are not the positive people you need to focus on.
I don't understand why you would even have a friend who is negative and controlling. That person would be in my "avoid" group and I would defiantly not invite someone like that to my place of living. Why pollute your party with someone who is so awful?
Same with your graduation. Only my husband went with me but my sister was going to and then cancelled last minute. But she stressed me out, insisting on driving when she doesn't live here and we would be driving on major highways which she doesn't know and she has a vision loss and honestly can't see well. So we had an argument about that and I said I will drive. Sheesh, I had been driving there for 3 years. I live in a big big city. Good grief. She is sometimes controlling but she is "nice" and my only living relative in contact.
I am saying this because the stress of arguing with my sister over who drives to my graduation really upset me. I had to hold to a boundary. My husband has worse vision loss and he said absolutely she can't drive, as he knows how hard it gets to see in the process of vision loss.
This is why I said don't invite your parents who will bring your brother who will ruin the happiness of that day. Most of my school friends and acquaintances were not even at graduation. It was weird, I knew NO ONE. And it was boring. I wish I had not gone. I could have celebrated it better without all the stress.
My sister is older than me and appears to have a cognitive disorder, either long not treated bipolar or early dementia. It is hard to both love her and set strong boundaries. We just won't let her drive with her vision loss and she gets angry. But why does the one with the worst vision demand to drive?