Hey hey-waving my paw,I didn't get to put in my two cents yet :p
As you said-you have been a long time devoting everything to school and now you're bored :P
What I would suggest is to try to enjoy this time and catching up with little things...also instead of work-why not look into some kind of volunteering that interests you? That way you control the hours and yourbody can get use to doing something in an schedule without the stress of work yet.

your probably going to need to file for disability...I do not know about your student loan or if you have those or not but with me being on disability I filed to have the student loans taken away and they accepted it but it takes a total of three years of them monitoring my status before they wipe away the student loans....which in my case is over $75K for my MA degree....yeah it started smaller than that but I was differed and never made any payments since 2002 when I graduated....so they grew to almost double that initial amount.....

good luck....figure out how to support family since it appears hubby does not have income now either....hugs bill

I know how you feel. Sure some of the pain is psychosomatic but that what pain is. Is your brain receiving and sending signals to your body in order to protect it. The best thing to do is to try to be patient, start working a little each day then increase when your symptoms subside. So maybe start looking for a flexible part time position. You cannot be discriminated for disability but it is important that you have awareness of your body and how much pain or stress can take each day before you commit to a full time job. I have not been able to even get to the point of looking into going back to work but the fact that you want to work and do things is a good sign. You just have to take it slowly and try to be positive! Hugs! Ciao!

I am lucky in that since it was the VA who put me through school, I have no debt to worry about! In fact, they paid me a monthly living expense while I was in class. The next part of my Voc Rehab, and what keeps the next two months of living expense payments coming, is proof of my job search.

I can honestly say I can't think of a single position, even part time, that I could handle right now. I quickly learn concepts, but details never make it into even short term memory, let along long term. The last time I worked, before I was in a quarter of the pain I am in now and on nothing but OTC pain killers once a day, I would lose track of whom I was sending an email to - at least once a week I would send invoices to the wrong clients. For the life of me, I cannot tell you a single thing that happened on Tuesday. Hubby said it was a bad pain day. I have no idea. I can't even remember ANY of it. This means that no matter what I do, I have to have someone micromanaging me - which will set off my PTSD. Then there is the problem with my pain - which on a good day might let me be active for a couple hours, with breaks. On a bad day it might be minutes.

My degree stressed lab and field work - but I am a fall hazard. I also can't work in the Ultra Clean labs unless we figure out a way to put my dog in the full lab outfit. Then again - my hands shake. I am more likely to drop specimens than to test them. I can't bend or stand or sit where I can't rest my back - even wearing my brace.

I signed a contract with the VA that I would contact at least five possible employers a week about a job and attend weekly "workshops". So far my job counselor thinks I have not got a chance in heck to work and I should just be on disability.

The employment market where we are at was at a boom for IT professionals for years - and for several years hubby brought home just shy of six figures. But now that those jobs went to India, he has not worked longer than a four month contract in three years. For the last year we have been living off what the VA pays me (which just covers the animals) and charity from his mom.

The only way I can see us making it at all is this...
1) we cut down the amount of stuff we are trying to take care of - I could be a double episode of hoarders!
2) we get out of this black mold infested house that is killing hubby, and probably not doing me much good
3) sell this property - preferably to some flipper who has the contacts to put a new house on it and will give us cash.
4) hubby and I pick up a cheap RV to live in and start to stage to his mom's house - she is paying all the bills anyway, it will cost less if we condense into one extended household. We live in the RV, she and my daughter live in the house.
5) I use the warmer climate to start to heal my back and take away some of this constant pain
6) Hubby uses his mom's house as a base to do a warm/dry area of the nation job search. He is even thinking of walking away from computers and going into welding.
7) Once he has a job, we move in the RV to his job and then see about finding a permanent place to live.

This is the point where I think I can work out exactly how much, if at all, I can work. So the job search right now is just paperwork. Even if I get an interview, after they talk to me in person there will be no chance I will get the job.

LOL - I can't volunteer again until I have time to turn around twice - which won't be until I get us out of this death trap of a house!

Yadlim and critters

Yadlim, I relate to what you are saying. I have questioned and questioned this . I tried stopping meds thinking, I just need to push thru this. Consequently, I could barely walk or use my hands. I even asked my doctor if I could have done something to cause this. She said, "People get sick all the time, and they didn't do anything to deserve it." For me, it is part of the cycle. Currently, I think I will always question this. However, maybe I'll change my thinking. The old adage, " one day at a time."

Gentle hugs

Oh - and the term is can't be "legally discriminated against". It actually happens all the time. The reason my last job gave the unemployment office as the reason for my being fired was that my disability was bad for company moral.

I could not find a lawyer to take the case.. sigh

Today I just want to give up - so instead I am pushing through the pain and sorting books into boxes that go and bins that stay.

Yadlim and critters

I hear you so loud and clear. For the last 10 days I have been in such horrible pain that all I could do is cry. I had my caudal injection on Tues and have gratefully received some relief. I laid in bed on Wed wondering what the heck made me go into this horrible never ending spasm and then I realized that I made me go into this spasm. Why? Because I tried to be "normal". I tried to be a good mother and drive to my daughters house, I tried to be a good wife and do grocery shopping and cook and I tried to be a good grandma and babysat for 4 of my grandchildren for two days.
What I tried so hard to forget is that I can't do it all. Driving hurts my back so I need to cut back. I had to go on disability because I couldn't work. This is something you might have to do. You got your degree and you should be so proud of yourself. Down the road when your life is a little less stressful you can always get a pt job. If you can and if you can't then so be it. Live your life as pain free as possible and go from there. You deserve it.