Well, I think what we are seeing is some who will start multiple new posts on the same day about how terrible life is and how sad they are and difficult their life situation is who then turn around to tell others just to think happy thoughts when they are down. It is most likely the double standard that the person fails to see that drives people to feel cross. It is easy to talk about lifting up our spirits but some here tend to fall into the abyss while expecting tons of support and then tell others to simply never fall.

Greekies, Or could it possibly be that they are having such highs and lows they are just reacting to that?
Not saying you might not have something there, but how can we know?

I know we sometimes can see into what is going on and maybe you are.
I have highs and lows too so I know I might come across like that sometimes.
Oh, well... just thought I would add this. No harm done.

Nice idea for a topic jc thanks

i just remember to ask myself is this response nice

Michael

We can't actually know what is happening for others. SO I imagine when some are down they start lots of threads (new) and then on good days they just offer replies. It is interesting thou.

I wonder if we all need to realize that we each handle pain differently and have more patience with each other. Some have said they go into hiding. I bet others reach out in desperation.

So can we all accept it when someone says, "Hey that is not helpful to me TODAY"? Realize they are in ned of something other than what we offered, and then offer something else without taking offense. That would be something!!!

If we all felt free to say, "i just did not want to hear that this day", then perhaps we would all be less likely to get hurt feelijgs. Because we are allowed to feel it, we can understand the other persons feeling that way and offer a differnt response.

sunny, that's a good point. just hearing yes from you on my thread helped. some days we need confirmation, then others we want ideas.

i know my brain doesn't work so well when i'm in pain and i may not express my needs or support the way i want to, but i still want to put something out there to give or receive.

this has been a very good and much needed discussion that i hope has brought us closer in tolerance and understanding.

Being positive is one of the most helpful things you can do for yourself when it comes to dealing with intense pain. It's been researched and proven many times over by Major Hospitals and Universities worldwide. If you go into a surgery with a positive, optimistic outlook generally things go smoother, with less post op pain and a quicker recovery. those who go into a surgery with negative, everythings gonna be bad, outlook are more at risk for cardiac problems, bleeding problems, longer recovery, and more pain.

Let's face it being in pain 24/7 takes it out of you, if you can do that with a smile on your face at times and a positive outlook in your head at least your not constantly sad or depressed. If your constantly angry, looking for someone to blame, negative and expecting others to fix you or your problems then it doesn't just take it out of you, it mows you over....who wants to live like that.

It's really interesting that when people are feeling well and happy, they would never expect a homeless, downtrodden bum off the street to be happy like they are....but when people are in pain and suffering they expect other to be suffering right along with them, otherwise they don't care or their making light of the situation. That thinking is so skewed.

Anything you do in life with a positive outlook will be easier and more pleasant to accept, every time.

Thanks JC, this side of the coin needed to be brought up.

Kat

I finally had time to read all the posts....

Sunnyb, as a cancer survivor myself, and after nursing my father in law through Stage II Lung Cancer to death in a 4 month period of time, can I just say that every time you pop off with one of your "I wish I had cancer" bits for this reason or that....it really chafes me. You may not mean to do it, or even realize your doing it....but saying things like that about a disease when you don't know who may be on this board that might actually have to be dealing with that disease....it's just not right.

I'm sure you'd get ticked pretty quick if I started saying oh i need to lose weight, wish i had Celiac....think about it huh?

Kat

Kat, i couldnt agree more with your comments.. It has been proven time and time again, and i have read similar reports about how you go into surgery... I also heard you come out from under the anesthetic, the same way you go under...if your emotionally upset and crying, you will come out of it crying, even hours later...
life takes a lot of patients, and tolerance...
~stinke~

kat,

You have no idea what all I have suffered with or how close to death I have been or the number of times.
Isn't interesting that here on a thread about being positive you have to say something really mean. And on the eve of my own surgery.
Maybe you sould head your own advice FIRST!

People talk about wishing they had celiac all the time. They talk to me like it is the greatest thing because I never eat cake and it must be so dam easy to have a disease that forces me to stay slim.
So before you start telling others off, maybe you should walk a mile in their shoes.

Sunny,

I didn't say anything mean, I said the truth, you constantly do it, and it's mean and degrading and rude to those of us that have to deal with it. You seem to think that everyone has to abide by some invisible set of rules except you...ummm..No, I don't think so. It's not right and you shouldn't do it.

And this has nothing to do with your surgery, at all. If i'd said it after your surgery you would have yelled at me for something else.

I don't have to walk a mile in your shoes, what people say to you in real life is not my fault, I can't control them, but that doesn't give you the right to say mean things on this board. Once again, not being mean, but correct.

I assure you I've had many, many thousands of MILES of my own shoes to walk in and have plenty left to go.

Sunny as I read your first post on here it made me realized just how much I have learned from everyone here about pain and how we all deal with it differantly me I am a complainer.. if I am in pain everyone is going to know it .

This group here knows just what I am feeling or can at least empathize with what I am feeling.

I have also learned that many of us that get diagnosed with one thing often find ourselves diagnosed with something else later on.

Sunny I am glad to have met you I am glad to met everyone. Each of you have literally saved me from my own self pity with your encouragement and help learning about things .. Thank you ..

Cathy

gotta love DS lol