Cheaters ONLY! Community Group

This group is for people who have had or are still having affairs and who want a safe place to get help and a place heal. If you are a BS, please be kind and not post in this group. Read all you want but please do not disturb the harmony. If negativity enters this group, it will be deleted. Good luck to all, and lets heal together.

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cindy666 04/22/2013

I don't know where this sordid tale belongs...maybe in 'For Sex Addicts Only', but that group is moribund. I was on an adult site. I saw an ad. In it a local 'FWB' couple was looking for someone to 'dog' with this evening. There was a pic of the male's, um, member. I know in my heart, soul and gut it was my OM. He is VERY distinctive looking and he was wearing shorts that are the same as some I have seen on him. Plus, he lives on FB and he was not there tonight. I am devastated. Sickened. Wish I had not gone looking on that site.

So much for my theory that he just prefers masturbation. Fibre is likely right. He has other women, a 10 minute girl, etc.

I realize I am every inch the hypocrite for being on that site. I realize that I am trash. I realize that I should not even want a man like that. I realize that I should probably not be posting this at all, but I need to process it and writing it all down helps.

I am so so sad at what I have become.

deleted_user 04/23/2013

Oooooh, this is dangerous territory for me. Literally, last night I pulled out that Steve Harvey book again and re-read the chapter on men and "this fish they keep and the fish they throw back in the water." Even though I don't want my OM to be with me in a real relationship, I still don't want to feel like a fish that should be thrown back. Not that he does that, really, but I feel like that is an almost unavoidable feeling in a situation like this.

Jaded - I spat out my tea when I read that last part. Peal necklaces... that's all I'm saying :)

deleted_user 04/23/2013

Hahaha - sorry I ruined your yea :)

deleted_user 04/23/2013

Tea*

cindy666 04/23/2013

I am definitely turned on by semi-public sex. Indulged when I was single before my marriage and loved it. The stranger part? I think if I were worked up enough and the strangers were attractive, I could enjoy it. Safe sex would be a must, of course.

I can see a Madonna/Whore thing going on with my OM, too. As I mentioned before, he posts about his old-fashioned family values and I have seen him refer to cheating spouses as whores (this was before he took up with me, but...)

cindy666 04/23/2013

I was obsessing over the ad...going back, looking at the picture, trying to convince myself it is not him. I joined so I could respond to the ad. Told him I was sorry I missed out. He replied that it didn't end up happening. If it is him, go figure. He always cancels on me. Maybe he cancels on her, too.

After I had this little exchange, I cancelled my account on the site. It is too sleazy, even for me. And obsessively looking at a picture of a penis is not a productive way to spend a day.

deleted_user 04/23/2013

Good for you! I'm glad that you indulged yourself enough to feel comfortable walking away from it.

cindy666 04/24/2013

In my short correspondence with him on the site, he let me know that he could also meet me without his FWB in a park. I am tempted to set something up just to catch him in the act. I am thinking that would be stupid and dangerous, though. Dangerous if by some stretch it is not him and the person posting is a predator. Dangerous if it is him and he reacts badly to me setting him up.

Then, again, if it is him, he would likely cancel or be a 'no-show' anyway...

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