Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
I really hope this post is cathartic for me.
I met a coworker and things became flirty and ultimately went too far. This is that story.
My company was relocating me from my current state to another state. I am a married man that is 36. The other person in the affair was also married and 30. It all started when she was hired by my company. There was something different about her instant attraction and chemistry. We connected and bonded immediately. She was traveling from HQ to my location before I moved down to HQ. The move was finally made and her flirting intensified. I couldn't resist I was so compelled and attracted to her. I finally asked her to kiss me and she said yes. I made a daring move in the bottom of a parking garage. It was instant sparks and fireworks.
Strangely, we never actually had sex, we did fool around quite a bit. Lots of hot intense make out sessions. We used the L word a lot. I did and still do love her. She was perfect for me so I thought.. I was willing to leave my wife for her. We were planning a future together. Then she moved out of state for a new job. I encouraged her to take. We had the affair through her having a baby with her husband through a new job. This past week my world came to a crashing halt. I believe her husband found our affair and she told me she wants to work it out with him. Rightfully so and the right thing to do. I respect that. I am heartbroken from that but I understand.
I know the cliché things like time heals all wounds and I need to focus on my family. I get that, but man this hurts. Has anyone else had this happen to them? They can't eat or sleep. I’ve lost 10 lbs. in a week. I feel sick constantly. How do I get through this? Is this the burden to bare?
This kills me. I cried and as a guy I am not a crier. I literally told my best friend, I didn't want to talk and that we shouldn't talk anymore.
I truly believe that she is the one. She will probably be the one that got away. And that is something I think I will have to live with. She did tell me she is starting therapy at the end of the month. I hope she finds some peace and happiness with that. It has done me good.
Her living in Maine and me living in Tennessee it just wouldn't work out long distance (obviously fake states but the same distance none the less). I am going to attempt to fix my marriage and give it an honest shot. She is doing the same with her Marriage. I think that is the right thing to do.
This is more painful than anything i've ever had to do. I probably will not post here again for awhile. I think I need to move forward and forget this dark month of my life. This has been hell and I am ready to move forward.
I love that woman and think I will always love her. I don't think there will ever be a part of me that won't love her. But the only way to find out if we were meant together or belong together is to be part and focus on our current relationships.
Thank you all and best of luck to everyone. I posted my email if anyone needs to reach out.
Writing is therapeutic. I did a lot of it. I guess you can still create journals here as we did. Check it out. Good luck.