Caring For Aging Parents Support Group
Caring for aging parents can be a difficul time as we become the caretakers for our parents. This broad responsibility can encompass such services as assisted living, adult day care, long term care, nursing homes, hospice care, and in-home care. Whether you have just started caring for your parents or just need a place to talk, we're here.
Hi everyone I am new here! For about 2 years i have been caring for my parents! Especially my mom! I live on the same ranch as they do! Its nice out here! A really beautiful place! My family gives me free rent to take care of them!. I make their meals! Dad can still drive and take care of his needs. But my mom is the one who needs help. We think she has dementia or alzheimers! For about the last 9 months it has been extremely hard mentally and physically! I have 4 sisters who are older than me. 2 work and the other two are facing physical issues of their own! I would never put my parents in a home. We have considered getting someone to help a few days when i have appointments! Please pray for me! Sometimes things are overwhelming!
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So I have been having a lot of health issues and my cardiologist felt that he didn't get clear enough images of my heart in the office, so he wanted to do a Trans-esophegeal heart Echocardiocgram in the hospital. I was pretty nervous about it, because I've never had any procedures related to my heart or any other major organs. I've had knee surgery and thyroid surgery, but to me anything to do...
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While it is a sad thing to think about, our parents' needs are only going to get more involved and complicated. Yes, getting them used to "outsiders" in the house giving care is a great idea! THe day will come when it is either ramp up the in-home care or put them in a care facility.
It is way too easy for the non-helping siblings to just assume that the one(s) who help at the start will see it through to the end.
The time will come when you really, REALLY need to get away. My wife and I are getting away for a week pretty soon. It will be our first week away since MIL moved in. I think that we will realize that it is a lot of good R&R and want to schedule more things. Not sure if my wife's brother and his wife will agree to an annual week with mom.
get the help. Otherwise you will burn out and be on the "needing help" end of the line....
Definitely make sure all the legal stuff is in place. Wills. POA's etc.
The time to plan is now, BRFORE something drastic happens.
It doesn't sound as though your mother has been diagnosed as of yet? If not, I would push for a full medical evaluation to access what stage she's in and then have a meeting with the family on any future arrangements that should be made on your mother's care. It's best to have all the financial and medical legal paperwork in place also.
There's some decisions to be made by your father and the children on what are the next future steps for both your parents future care. It's not easy as most families differ in opinions on the type of care etc.
I agree, it can be completely overwhelming, especially when the family depends on one person to handle all the issues so to save yourself some future headaches, I would start working on what the folks here have suggested.