Yup, this is very common. Do you have a POA in place for his care? If so, you can send that over to the Dr's office. This will allow you to discuss your father's medical care with the doctor either over the phone or in private.

You can fill the doctor in on symptoms that you've noticed with your father. The doctor, upon the next visit can do a basic Mini-cog test. It's a short test but it has a high degree of accuracy to determine early onset dementia.

If you don't have that paperwork in place, I'd look into it. Talk to your parents about it. They may be very open to the conversation. It's worth a try.

I agree with PD on the power of attorney (POA). It is the best tool to let you talk to his doctors. You can always talk to the doctor, but without POA or some such designation, you can only leave messages and hope that the doctor sees them and takes them into consideration.

Selling your dad on POA may be difficult, but if you mention to him about "people you know" who did not get their wishes respected when in the h0spital because no family member had the necessary POA.

My mums in the later stages, and if you live with him like i live with my parents, arm yourself with as much knowledge as you can. Its going to get tough and you will need support from family and outside resorces if you can.
Dad 89 bless him has kept to all the vows he made at church all those years ago. I am humbled.
Sadly we didn't get the money side of things sorted, i hope you can.
One thing to consider, not a nice one, has your mum and dad made a will?
As they are married if your mum dies first all her money and estate goes to him and as he's got dementia forgetting pin numbers for cards and being able to write his signature for a cheque....I dont know if America is the same but "joint" saving accounts get frozen upon death until probate is sorted, this is lengthy if there is no will. well... you might want to seek a solicitor and see what your options are.
As tough as it is i hope you find humour along the way... My mum complained her knickers were tight, and when dad checked..... she was wearing his underwear!

lol that is funny Empathy66 your mom wearing your Dad's underwear! I know this is a serious matter and it is not easy caring for elderly parents but they do somethings to make you laugh. My Grandmother was a tough lady to deal with when she had dementia before passing away in 2010. She insisted that she wasn't going to fall off of the bed even though we were telling her she was going to fall off. Then finally my mom couldn't take it anymore and didn't want to argue with her so she picked my Grandmother up and threw her into the middle of the bed and away from the edge and then with an attitude my Grandmother realized for a split second that she really was about to fall off of the bed and she yelled Thank you to my mother lol

Haha cute stories! I remember when grandpa was home with us and we had a chicken that would come in the window in the morning, jump on him in bed and then lay an egg in the closet. Anything to amuse the old man. I miss the old boy. That chicken too.