Caregivers Support Group

A voluntary caregiver is a spouse, relative, friend or neighbor of a disabled person or child who assists with activities of daily living and assists those unable to fully take care of themselves. The challenges of a caregiver are unique and sometimes it's hard to find people to talk to who know what you're going through. Join the conversation and find others who...

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KiddoGal 10/20/2012

Hi All,

I am considering hiring in home caregiving help at some point down the road. We have an extra bedroom and it is only my husband and I that live in our home. My husband is becoming less mobile, and I drive him to dialysis 3 days per week. In between it is doctors and hospitals. I have a sucessful business but the last 6 months I have hardly been at the office (thank goodness for my dedicated staff). I am getting caregiver burnout, and physcial and mental burnout. It would be so nice just to get up and let someone else handle the tough stuff while I do the things I need to do with my business or actually take a day off just for me.......Anyway.......

It seems like in the long run it would be less expensive to have a live in than paying the $20.00 per hour to some caregiving company to have someone here for the day or a few days per month. Do any of you have live in help? Do you pay a salary + room, or salary + room + food, or ??? I live in Southern Calfornia where I figure it will cost me more to have live in help. How do you handle worker's compensation, if you do offer it? Are they there to help 24/7 or do you give them 2 days off per week? Is it better to have a male or female caregiver? ( I think because my husband will eventually require more physical care I am considering a male caregiver).

Any advice, stories, suggestions, help, is greatly appreciated!

Thanks!

loveyorks 10/23/2012

Hi. Sorry I don't have any advise for you as I live in Canada and the laws regarding leave ins are very different here. I just wanted to send you hugs and hope you manage to resolve your worries.

deleted_user 10/23/2012

Hello Kiddo, I'm not familiar with hiring live-in help either. But I think I'd try to hire a male caregiver. I know how my husband is and it bothered him alot in the rehab hospital that his occupational therapist was young woman. She had to teach him how to wash himself in the shower and I could tell he was not comfortable.

Just my humble opinion. Good Luck !!

Hugs galore, Patricia :-)

deleted_user 10/23/2012

I suspect the laws for live in hired help vary from state to state, so I would be checking with your state for that information. Here, I have hired a temporary live in caregiver for 10 days at a time while I took respite time for myself so it wasn't for long term. I told the caregiver that I would hire them for the time IF they agreed they were self employed, thus they were responsible for S/S and income taxes being paid to the government. I paid $100/day plus room and board. Both the caregiver and I were satisfied with the arrangements. The toughest part of finding a good caregiver is following up on background and work history once they answer your ad. I hope that helped a little bit.

KiddoGal 10/23/2012

Yes, a male caregiver is my preferred choice. I am just not as strong as I used to be and when I had to do a lot of bending and stooping to wash him when he first got home from the hospital, my back was killing me. Plus the female caregiver I had for a few weeks was fine with washing him, but he wouldn't let anyone but me give him the baths....

Also, I like the idea of your suggestions, caring1, to let them know they are self employed and responsible for any taxes, etc. Plus a thorough background check is a must. Thanks!

aurorio 10/30/2012

First of all, I commend you for making the decision to get extra help. Sometimes it's hard for us caregivers to realize that we can't do it all.

I am live-in help for my grandmother and after I left my full-time job we arranged for me to be paid for some of the time I am here. One bit of advice that I have is that you could check your homeowner's insurance policy. Some policies (my grandmother's included) have worker's comp coverage for in-home employees. Does your husband have health insurance (like long-term care) that might cover some of the other costs?

I would get in touch with your county or town health department as well as a local hospital. They usually have listings of private duty nurses, aides, or caregivers and that can be a good place to start your search. I do recommend hiring on your own. Agencies can be too costly and a bit of a hassle.

I hope some of this helps! Good luck! You're making the right decision. :)

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