Dude, if you do it right, you end up with hot sweaty sex. You are bitching why exactly?

Let me think soon......I don't have a job...I don't have money to spend on a date. I am not going to get anywhere at this rate.

It is an evil holiday.

Homemade card, pick the flowers, make dinner, pasta and red sauce.

El cheepo V-Day, but more special than commercialized stuff (unless you are buying Godiva and Tiffany)

With whom....and who would be attracted to a 31 year old guy who lives at home with his parents and is looking for a job? No one...that is the answer.

Patience Heave, it is a virtue

Just pointing out the obvious Soon. Valentines Day is a sham for me. It isn't going to be anything but a day where my face is getting rubbed in it again.

Heave, most of us in this support group don't have anyone this Valentine's Day, but try and think of someone else who might not get a Valentine, a special friend, your Mom or anybody who just might need to know that someone is thinking of them. What you give out is what you get back, the powers of positive thinking.

Heave, a very understanding person that knows that life throws these unimaginable curve balls, that's who. There are some people who want good looking people who can give them all the material objects they want. They don't get that life can be harsh and someone has to step back to places they did not want to be again. Then there are others who look at what the person has to offer inside and ignores the physical place the other person is at. Those are the people who count in life. The ones who are still by you even though you are where you never wanted to return.

I feel as though I lost a decade of my life and returned with 4 kids to boot. But I am regaining my strength and realizing that even though I did not WANT this to happen; there was a NEED for it to happen.

(())'s. Take time to work on yourself that way when it is time to have a new relationship you will be a healthier you and so will be your new relationship. I know it hurts to be alone but you are the one who will heal and have a better understanding of you who are and what you really want out of life.

--Sara

Ah Forget it...I will just get my boat a valentines day present.....after all she is the only lady left in my life! LOL

Here is the thing. I go through a period where I am finally healing up, then I have another thing come and knock me down. I battle for months and fight off 5 major life crisis at one time.

I am on the downhill part of this and in a holding pattern waiting for a job.

As far as not being selfish....For the last 7 years I have been living for other people, really 9.5 years. During the 7 years of my marriage I rarely go to do things solely for me. My ex got something out of everything I did. This was fine but she wasn't giving back to me as she was very selfish.

Now that I don't have her in my life and running me down, it is time to live for ME! That is right, I am tired of being out there providing service for people when I was working and coming home and being in a marriage where someone was taking all from me and giving me nothing back. It is ME time and it is highly due!

I am not worried about being lonely. It just sucks to have my nose rubbed in my divorce everytime a commercial comes on T.V. Valentines Day is a couple's holiday and everytime I visit with my friends they are with their special someone (as all my friends are married or in relationships) and I am the outsider, the fifth wheel. I am sick of that as well.

Life seldom goes the way we plan it. You know what, I realize that but it is high time that I get a brake and something good comes my way. I have seen horrible human tragities, watched people die, and been in places where other people would run away and I kept on going. I was doing it for something more than the measley paycheck I was bringing home. I was doing this to help other people. I did these things, followed the rules, and all I got in the end was grief.

It is me time! That is right...me time.

Heave,

Your whining. I guarantee women don't find that attractive.

True...but this is a place to wine sometimes.

Ah Valentines.........

Lets see, the last Valentines that I celebrated........

A surprise date! When we got home from the days work, I had her a new outfit to wear and surprises her with a date and reservations for a nice dinner. Prime Rib for 2, a lovers dinner complete with heart napkins and little heart mints.....

When we got home I explained that it was "her" night! I drew her a hot bath with relaxing bath salts and aroma therapy. While she was in the bath I got out the things I had staged for this night.

From the bath she went to the massage table where I gave her a hot oil candle light massage. I had researched the correct aromas and techniques so that I could do the best possible job to make her relax.

Ah hour later it was off to the shower to clean up from the oil. While in the shower I prepped the next phase. Rose pedal pathway, new high thread count sheets that she had been wanting, rose pedals in the bed and fluffy pillows all around. Her favorite wine chilled and ready.

Candle light conversation as we sipped our wine. A poem that I had worked on for a month just for her.

We were planning the rest of our lives. It never crossed my mind that 5 months later, it would all be over. I still don't know why. I still don't understand. It's been 3 years since that night. It seems like forever.

By the next valentines she was married to someone else. We live in a small town. I get to pass her house everyday and see the other guys truck there. I have moved on and tried the dating thing, but here I sit, alone with no real prospects. I still don't know if I can trust and truly love again.

Bernie, I know whining isn't attractive and I don't most of the time and never out where people see me looking happy all the time; but, tonight, I have to go with heave on this one

F%#@!@ Valentines

I, like many other men and WOMEN on here, may feel the same way... Valentine's Day sucks. But to say it was created to oppress men is just ridiculous! Your view is pretty skewed. I know you're in a lot of pain, but so are a lot of us.