hi, i'm sorry you are experiencing this awful pain. here on daily strength, you will find lots of support, and comforting care. i know right now, the emotions and feelings are very intense. i encourage you to write, talk, share, and always know, if you need us, we're here. sending a warm welcome, and wishing you peace.

OMG, jht70, you mean to tell you have not moved on yourself for nearly ten years. Wow I wish well and I do feel some of your pain. I just lost the love of my life. Hope that I will be at a better place and someone that I truly love and truly love me back in ten years. I wish you find your peace and happiness soon. Sorry to say but your story does not give me hope, but I hope you success soon.

Have you considered getting counseling jht70? 10 years is an awfully long time not to have moved on from a divorce. I do not say this with disrespect, rather with concern. It is not normal to be 10 years down the road and not have accepted the divorce and moved on with your life.

I am sorry for your pain
I know your tears...and that savage pain

Please get professional help to navigate through your nightmare

Be nice to yourself and know you can also have a better life

10 years??? Did U have kids together? Did you two remain in contact for 10 years after the divorce? This doesn't seem possible unless there was some kind of contact and what not. I was a mess after my wife left after 24 years but 13 months later I'm way better than I was and if she got married I would just feel sorry for the guy. She's high maintenance.

yes please give us some more details on the situation so we may be able to give better advice. Hope you are seeing a therapist also or that you have a good family support system

No, we did not have any kids but we did talk from time to time, but not recently. There was never any closure, and what I mean by that is there was never a moment when she said "it's over or "don't call me again." The door always seemed opened and I just thought that somehow we would end up together. It just hurts so much that she could be in love with somebody else. I just have this overwhelming need to talk to her, just for one minute. My friends have advised me against this and have told just to let her be happy. But I want to talk to her so bad I can't stand it!

Many may advise NOT talking to her, but let us be real here. Talking to her might be your best shot and airing your feelings and understanding the breakup. Clearing the air so that you can move on isn't pathetic or sad or desperate. It takes nerve to approach an ex and speak honestly and openly about what happened and getting that closure you need.

I'm sorry you had to hear that she got remarried. That must've been very hard. My ex went on a date with someone else a little over a week ago when we were still together and it REALLY HURTS. So I kinda know how you're feeling. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

cmon man, no closure?
I'm sorry, I know what it is like to not want the divorce, but if the lovely bride decides to divorce that is closure
if you talk to her, what do you think she will say?
it won't be "geez I'm sorry"

I'm sorry you're still in so much pain after so many years. While you may feel the need for closure, o advise against contacting her. She's moved on in the most definitive way possible. She's a newlywed. She's unlikely to want to revisit your breakup. Besides she's not going to be able to give you an objective assessment of her behavior ten years ago. She's moved on and it's time for you to do the same.