Because she is selfish and thinks of no one but herself. She is shady and a liar. I think you should be glad you are rid of her. Your anger will fade and you will realize that your life is so much better without her. While she will be struggling to support her loser ex and finds out the grass wasn't greener on the other side.

oh.. my.. God...

but I agree with coop, people downgrade all the time because they need to be with someone who is actually at their own level.

My STBX's friend, whom she's living with because her friend's husband was deployed to Afghanistan for a year, is gone for a a couple of weeks. Guess who's been sleeping over while her friend is gone? Yep, that loser fuck. How do I know? Well, my oldest step-daughter, who's 17 (has different dad, not the loser) told me. She hates what her mom did/is doing and has absolutely no respect for the guy her mother is with now...err, with again.
Yes, my STBX has multiple kids form multiple men, luckily none with me.
Anyway, my step-daughter told me this because she feels a sense of loyalty to me and thought I should know. I very graciously told my step-daughter that I appreciate her keeping me informed, but I don't really need nor want to know what her bitch ass mom and that loser fuck are doing (I left out the bitch ass and loser fuck comment).

Hey sorry for the foul language, I'm not normally this vulgar, but I'm pretty pissed at the moment.

sounds like you need less 'knowing' friends.. I went through my FB after we broke up and literally deleted over half my friends list.. and it was all because I didn't want to deal with what your dealing with now.. I had to disassociate myself from his circle.. when in truth it was OUR circle.. but I just couldn't do it, I didn't want to see or hear his name muchless anything he's been up to!.. I went back to my small circle of friends that he was not associated with, I honestly dont know what was harder for me, losing him.. or losing all my family and friends that came with him.. I still get messages from 'mutual' friends asking how I'm doing.. wanting to get together.. I just can't.. I ignore the calls, .. his family was MY family for years.. but in truth it IS his family.. and the right thing for me to do, for you to do.. is cut them loose.. atleast until the anger fades, and your able to stand on your own two feet without feeling the wind knocked out of you at mention of her doings..

It's great you're still close to your stepdaughter but she's old enough to know you are setting boundaries. I talk to my son almost every day, he's my step son but I raised him since he was 2 and he's 27 now lol. Anyways when he was still talking to his mom I told him I don't want to hear shit about her. I told my daughter this too, she still lives with me and is 18 now but talks to her mom all the time. She knows I really don't want to hear details. If you want to still have a relationship with your step kids and they look up to you then you should. But SET boundaries. I'm so glad I have a great relationship with my son, by the way he knows his mom is batshit crazy and doesn't talk to her anymore.

Good job setting boundaries with your stepdaughter. The fact that your stepdaughters want to maintain a relationship is a testament to your character. Your wife is clearly lacking in that department. As much as the betrayal hurts, be grateful that you got out now when you have time to have many happy years with someone who appreciates you.

It sounds like you handled it well in spite of the hurt, though you probably should not have sent her the text and given her the satisfaction of knowing it hurts you.
I agree on the boundaries. I have told friends I don't want to hear about her new guy or what they are doing together. It is a little harder for my 11-you son to respect those boundaries, but we are doing the best we can.
Good job gently (in spite of the internal invectives in your head) letting your step-daughter know your boundaries, and it sounds like you have a good relationship with her and that she recognizes your commitment and character.

Got a text from my STBX saying things aren't working out with her and her daughters staying at her friend's house and she's looking to move out on the 20th.

My response was "That sucks"

Tailspin, that had to feel great! Good for you for not caving and offering her a place to stay. Sounds like maybe the friend didn't have the loser boyfriend in her house. I'm sorry for your stepdaughters, having a mom like that and no obvious stability. Mommy dearest made her bed, and now everyone has to sleep in it including her kids. As a mom, I did and still do everything I can to make sure my kid has a stable environment. I know in some's eyes I've completely fucked her up divorcing her dad, but at least her dad and I do our best to work together and keep her situation as loving and caring as possible.

That must have been great to read. Not so much for the step kids but that her life isn't so peachy after all. Nice response too. I recently had one of those moments. When my husband mentioned a fight he had with OW. I was secretly enjoying their misery.

thats both good and bad... just be careful not to back pedal!.. she' knows you, and she knows exactly what buttons to push to try to get you back in her life.. I had moved out exactly 1 month, and my ex came begging back to me, saying he was so sorry for everything, if he could he'd take it all back.. blah blah blah.. as sweet as that sounded, he cheated.. he broke me.. and he turned his back.. I dont know what was going on with them that made him turn back to me.. but I walked away.. and needless to say yet another month later, he was back in her arms..

you are really really fresh from this break, so just be careful here.. remain as NC as you can

often with kids room mating never works. You already helped her enough let her figure this out on her own. I wouldn't even want to listen myself to their woes when they chose to leave and I would tell them that. I don't make a lot and I left with my 3 kids, we down sized. I was told to leave because of saying I wasn't happy and wanted to discuss it and I left. if I can do it most anyone can figure it out. We struggle but I do it.

Yeah, it did make me feel good, but I'm sad for the kids.
She texted me later that night, "I know you don't like me right now, I don't like me but I made my bed right?" She then asked if she can have one of our sofas and 1 of our LED TVs. She said she doesn't care which sofa and which TV I give her. Her words were, "May I please have..." When I told her which sofa and TV she can have, she replied, "Thank you very much. I really appreciate it." I almost felt bad for her, I said "almost."

She then texted, "Please don't give up on the girls, you are the closest thing to a father they've had and I want them to know they are loved by someone, not just mommy. Even though I split up our family, they need to know you are still there for them."

My response, "You're welcome and of course I will never give up n the girls." I kept it short and she replied with a simple "thank you."

I knew something like this would happen sooner or later. Anyway, I am not going to offer her a place to stay. Where she lives is her problem, but if things get too hard for the girls, I'm more than willing to take them in. They are innocent people with a messed up mom.

That response was absolutely perfect! I can't imagine anyone could of handled it better. Stay strong!

Tailspin, you are doing great compared to just a few months ago! Stay on track!