I hated her saying she's walking out of the boys life and her giving up all rights. I have to say after thinking about it all day yesterday and having nearly zero contact with her I started to get more comfortable with the idea of full custody. I had a fairly peaceful day hanging out with the boys like normal, not having them ask me if I was OK. I hated that I couldn't always hold it together long enough to leave the room. We sat and talked about what had happened with mom, never bashing her. She's still mom just has to work through her stuff. I went to bed and actually fell asleep without an anxiety pill. At 1a.m. this morning phone starts ringing. Half asleep I answer and probably shouldn't have. Three and a half hours go by. She's crying and remorseful begging me not to take our boys from her. At first I let my feelings for her dictate my responses. I tried to work it out rationally. Then bam I'm the bad guy and it's my fault she walking away. Then sobbing that I should just block her number and she should turn herself into the police for neglecting and mentally abusing the kids. Several mood swings later I realized I'm trying to fight for crazy to stay. I finally told her I won't change my custody decision and I can't talk anymore. She texted nonsense into the afternoon. I stayed strong and didn't feed into her. Then she used my daughters struggles to lure me back to the table. It's been a long day and she brought me back to pain. It's manipulation, I see that. She had 17yrs to learn what buttons to push. Could use some words of strength and encouragement today.