
Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

bigguy3
I had my boys tonight. My ex was supposed to go to a mother/daughter thing the school sponsored. She asked me to take the boys so she wouldn't have to find a sitter for the boys. I didn't have any other plans so I was glad to be able to have some additional time to spend with my kids.
My oldest son was telling me about my ex-wife's current boyfriend. He said he was upset at his mom because she asked her boyfriend to spend the night and my son didn't like that. The excuse she gave was that her boyfriend was too tired to drive home (yeah, I believe that ... NOT). Anyway, the next morning my son told her that he didn't sleep well and kept waking up all night long because he was uncomfortable that her boyfriend was there in the house.
Later that night, as I was bringing my boys back to her place, my youngest said, "I bet mom's boyfriend will be at the house.", and sure enough, his car was in the drive way when I got there. Apparently, my ex skipped the mother/daughter thing, took my daughter out to dinner and ice cream then came home and called up her boyfriend to come over then told my daughter to call me in about an hour to bring the boys home. My ex had told me that she would call me when they were done with the mother/daughter night ... apparently, she needed some mother/boyfriend time as well.
This disregard for the wishes of the children and the irresponsible behavior of having a man she has only been dating for a short period of time sleep in the house when she has the children really bothers me. When I have the kids with me I could care less who she has over for the night ... but I don't think it is right for her to have a "house guest" while she has the kids with her. Do you think I am over reacting? What would you do?
My oldest son was telling me about my ex-wife's current boyfriend. He said he was upset at his mom because she asked her boyfriend to spend the night and my son didn't like that. The excuse she gave was that her boyfriend was too tired to drive home (yeah, I believe that ... NOT). Anyway, the next morning my son told her that he didn't sleep well and kept waking up all night long because he was uncomfortable that her boyfriend was there in the house.
Later that night, as I was bringing my boys back to her place, my youngest said, "I bet mom's boyfriend will be at the house.", and sure enough, his car was in the drive way when I got there. Apparently, my ex skipped the mother/daughter thing, took my daughter out to dinner and ice cream then came home and called up her boyfriend to come over then told my daughter to call me in about an hour to bring the boys home. My ex had told me that she would call me when they were done with the mother/daughter night ... apparently, she needed some mother/boyfriend time as well.
This disregard for the wishes of the children and the irresponsible behavior of having a man she has only been dating for a short period of time sleep in the house when she has the children really bothers me. When I have the kids with me I could care less who she has over for the night ... but I don't think it is right for her to have a "house guest" while she has the kids with her. Do you think I am over reacting? What would you do?
Posts You May Be Interested In
-
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
-
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
There isn't a lot you can do about it unless he's got some major problems. I think your son is your major concern here and as hard as it may be, you need to tell him he'll be fine and to comfort him. Regardless of your moral opinion she is free to do as she pleases. Your biggest job is to comfort that boy and bite your tongue as best you can. Someday you will be introducing someone to your children as well.
If your son is uncomfortable with it..and he should be..it is definately your business.
Make sure your son that is uncomftable with it,lets her know all the time. If you and her can talk about it, that is the best, make sure she knows that you dont care when the kids are not there, but when the kids are there that this should not happen. That is what I did with my sons mother.
Just remind her, this is not about you two, it is about the kids. That is important! KIDS FIRST!
Because this involves our children, the situation IS my business. Who she sleeps with, goes out with etc., is NOT my business, but when it affects our children then it is a different ballgame and it becomes MY business. I will try to talk to her about it but her response to me when I bring stuff like this up has always been "Thanks for your concern, but I will do what I want to anyway."
I have my children again this weekend (not my regularly scheduled weekend but the ex has a party Friday night and a class on Saturday - at least that is what she told me, so I have agreed to spend more time with them rather than a sitter.) I will try and get a feel how my daughter feels about things as well.
And it was not my daughter that changed her mind regarding the mother/daughter night. She very much wanted to go to the mother/daughter thing and was really looking forward to it. It is typical behavior by my ex to have no regard for ANYONE'S feelings except her own.
I don't know anything about this guy other than the car he drives and what he looks like from a picture I have seen.
I realize that my children will need to get comfortable with both my ex and myself dating other people. But dating, and spending the night with are two completely different things.