Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I left him in November (for many reasons, one of which the affair he was having that I couldn't prove until later). We are not legally separated (by the courts) and he has already moved the OW into my house. Now the other woman wants to bond with my daughter by spending the afternoon with her getting their nails done. They are pretending to be a happy little family while I am considering suicide. People tell me that I am strong. I don't feel it. Each time my daughter goes to visit with her father and his new family, I go into a cave which takes me days to crawl back out of. It is starting to affect my job. I fear what may happen during one of these visits. I am going to counseling and I am on medication. I have plenty of friends, however, I still sinc into major depression with fits of bawling when my daughter goes over there. I shut the world out while she is with them. I crawl in bed and don't come out until she gets home. Then when she tells me what they did. I freak out and make comments that I shouldn't. From calling the OW nasty names to telling my daughter she might as well move in with them. I fear my daughter may grow to hate me for being so bitter and miserable. My daughter is 13. She should be enjoying her life. Not worrying about me all the time.
If any one has any suggestions as to how I can learn to handle my bitter anger towards this new family my husband is creatling and how to cope with my daughter being a part of it. I would greatly appreciate it.
If any one has any suggestions as to how I can learn to handle my bitter anger towards this new family my husband is creatling and how to cope with my daughter being a part of it. I would greatly appreciate it.
patti - my daughter is in a way playing us. what mommy won't buy her, she will go to daddy. she is very materialistic, just like her father. Every extra penny I have, has always gone to her. I shop in the goodwill/walmart while she shops at Hollister and Areopostale. i am done givng - giving - giving and receiving attitude in return. That is what started our fight the other night, which led me to saying some really bad things about the OW. they are true, but not for a 13 yrs olds ears. I have tried counting to 10 before opening my mouth, I have even taken a walk around town to calm down. Just doesn't work anymore. I need to find a new outlet. Or just keep my big fat mouth shut.
Thanks for your concerns. I really do appreciate everyone reaching out to me. I really couldn't get thru this without eveyone on here.
Galvatron - send me some jokes. I wanna a belly roll laugh.
thankis for your response - your story does give me hope
I get the feeling that your daughter is just like her dad.
Just remember this: She's still a kid. (Unfortunately that means that your ex is essentially still just like a kid himself.) Being self centered and materialistic is pretty normal kid behavior.
If you don't have the money...you don't. Don't apologize for it. (Hey, I don't have the money myself.) If he wants to be Santa Clause all the time and buy her everything.....let him. She won't get it until she's grown and starts trying to pay all of the bills herself.
Try to be happy with your daughter. We human beings are always drawn to happiness so she will definitely want to spend more time with you.
Any negative words or feelings will only push her away as children naturally rebel at that age.
You have no reason to be jealous she is your daughter and nobody can change it ever.
Be happy for your child if she is being loved and taken care of.