this is not the least bit weird. a house is a home. and, home is one of the most important things in a person's life.

the trick now is to transfer your emotional attachment from this home to your next, presently unknown one. start picturing it in detail. then, start setting goals and strategies to find and create it. creating a home that really does it for us takes imagination and practicality. i hope your next one is perfect for you. :)

you women are so smart to love your homes. more men should love theirs too.

Thank you "faithful" - I knew you would be one of the first to chime in. You always have such great advice.

My 'only' issue with making this new house a home, is the fact that it's a rental and I know that I will not live there forever.

I have tried to picture myself in this house. I have been over there everyday since I gave the landlord the deposit and I have been putting my personal touch on the house. I am moving forward with a great deal of passion. I'm just afraid that the last time I walk out the door of the other house, I'm gonna crack.

Sounds normal to me.
I'm so glad my husband agreed with me that since I was going to have custody of the kids, that we should stay in the house. This is my forever home. It's an old house and I can't wait to start fixing it up. Well as soon as I get some $ ;)

Bring some of your favorite things to the new house so you still feel at home. And get some new things to make it your new home.

my mother used to say, "it isn't where you live, it is how you live." she could make a cave into a home if she had to.

passion is a darned good thing to have. let it out and it will really work for you.

people have a stereotype in their heads about rentals. they feel like nomads or gypsies needlessly. so, they never really put effort into creating a good home if it is just a rental. they shoot themselves in the foot by not creating a soft place to land at the end of the day.

do the opposite of them. plant flowers. put a wreath on your door. put down roots. do everything that you would as if it were a home that you were buying.

on your last day in this home, really enjoy it as you walk from room to room reminiscing. that was a very important place of a very important chapter. yes, it is sad but it is also a lot of good memories too to take forward from here. every good thing that happened there can be made even better in this, your next chapter - only better !

tremorchrist - I wish I could afford to stay in my old home. It has 6 bedrooms - formal living room - rec room - den - 2 1/2 bathrooms - 2 outer buildings with running water and eletric - a pool - a hot tub and sits on 3 1/2 acres in the country.

I'm moving to an extremely older home (100 yrs or more) with 2 bedrooms and one bath right down town. Fire department on one end of the street and the police department on the other. (At least I will feel safe). Unless it turns out to be one of the haunted houses in the town. (We live in an area where the "underground railroad" traveled thru with lots of haunted houses. We'll seeeeeee......

Wow, I'm going through the exact same thing! I moved out with my 2 kids in July and left the mess of a husband behind with our home we built together (on a lot given to him by his family, so his sister lives next door - wouldn't have been good for me to stay there - too tense). I cry weekly over the house I miss. I made it a home. I miss being able to let my animals out to roam the big back yard, and feeding the birds at my feeder. I moved into a duplex, and I do feel like a gypsy. Hate to put down roots when I know I won't be able to afford it long term and will have to move. Spent 24 years in that house, so it's hard.

I'm trying to make the best of it. You should too. We have to make our new places our homes however we can. I'm sad and think about the good times in the house, but then remember all the awful times too, and that makes it a little better.

For all of you that have posted, I am sorry for your separation and divorces. I went through a divorce too, years ago.

I have long had this statement that I have made through the years and I still believe it is true. A house is just a house. It takes a woman to make a house, a home. I know that leaving a house that was your "dream house" or was a house that you always thought you would grow old in, isn't easy. In my case, we lost our "first" house in a fire and 2 years later, I lost our second house when we separated. Through my life, I have lost many things that were not within my control. I lost the houses I mentioned, but in the last 12 years, I lost my parents, 3 half-sisters, 2 half-brothers, and my son, to death. These are the greatest loses in my life. These houses were just physical things. Those I loved, were living, breathing beings that gave love, support, feelings, kindness, laughter and joy to my life. These are the true things that matter in life. True friends, loved ones, and family are those things that last a lifetime. Houses rot out, cars rust out and clothes wear out. I know that moving out is not easy, I have been there too but, focus on your future, the true joys of life and enjoy life instead of enduring it. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

oldbiker - you are so right . I will definately try to embrase those words as I pull away from the house for the last time this Sunday.

And for your losses over the years. I am truly sorry. Your situation, definately makes me look at mine in a whole new light.

Thank you for your kind words.

Are you legally bound to leave? If not, I'd fight for it. I did. It's where the kids know as home.

inlights - I can't afford the mortgage and he will do everything in his power to evade paying child support and/or alimony. He is currently trying to get full disability for an injured shouler. he is hoping to get a huge settlement - retire and live off of that. I really need me an attorney.

I too, am in the SAME situation. It's been 5 weeks. Moved into an apartment last weekend. I walked away from the house, er, the HOME that WE built together. I took 1 dog, he has the other. It's NOT easy at all. He still has the home, and a new chick already living what was supposed to be MY life...

You have to make the best of it. I am sad all day long while I am at work, but when I get back to my new place at night, I think of all the new memories I might be able to make there. It's far from familiar, but it's time to take control back of your life.... I think I should start following my own advice. :0/

you're not attached to the house... you're attached to the dreams you had FOR the house.

look to the future.. you can have those dreams again, a beter man and a happy family are within your reach and are closer than they have ever been.

(hug)
your future is bright. you can still live out those dreams

my ex promised me the house. Now he has changed his mind ouch. Ill be glad to be rid and make a new start. YOu have a new future in front of you and a new home. Its painfull to let go> But im sure once yo do you will be fine x

I was in a similar situation as you, I knew I wouldn't be able to afford the mortgage, and since we agreed the kids should have a house (vs selling it), my ex is that one he kept the house. It is hard, and it is normal to feel this way... It's been one year today, and I still sometimes miss the house, especially the neighbors... But I am sure someday I'll have a house of my own, and the nice part is I won't have to deal with the memories (of the marriage and such) in my new place. It'll be my own...never his if that makes sense. I am glad the kids have a home.

we built our house when I was pregnant with my youngest... thought it would be our last and final house. At the time, I made my ex promise we'd never move again. Well that was 4 yrs ago... now I am the one to move again... but it is worth it...I know it was the right thing...