In adding this Comment, I Oestonee, do promise to be nice.

Ost... you're better than I am...

on a positive note... I've made my statement about the POS who posted above me and am going to walk away...

I won't engage an unarmed idiot in a battle of wits... just not fair

I agree with #4, she sounds exhausted and at the end of her rope.

Check this out
http://www.divorcebusting.com/a_walkaway_wife.htm

Justhavetobeme.... that was a great article... I can relate to the walkaway wife.. however, I cannot relate to the walkaway mother.. my children always came first, above all else!

Both my ex-husbands were/are good daddies. I see why the men here are insulted by Geo's comment. However, in some ways, it's generational. My Dad was a totally hands-off kind of guy. My mother commented that it was really nice to see men taking an active role in parenting their kids. You can go to places (like Italy) and see that old model still in action. Parenting was the woman's job for the most part.
I am happy to see the men here getting ruffled tho. Go Dads!

I used to wonder why my ex's ex wife before me just up and left with a fistful of dollars and abandoned it all...I raised their son since my ex was left with sole custody. I treated that child as if he came out of my very womb....the years went and I nurtured him as he was broken...neglect was evident from him and her. She neglected him as she was broken and he neglected the child as he wouldn't come home until late at night....the child withered...

I raised that child and I judged her for abandoning him....how can a mother leave a child?

Fast forward....my ex is a passive aggressive monster and I'm sure his ex whore will read this to him but, he was...she did not live with him....So, I wondered until I found myself losing ME...he made me feel worthless, unworthy and neglected...WAIT...I ALLOWED IT...that is now repaired....*curtsies*...anyhow, after he and I decided to divorce, I contacted his ex wife as she needed to know that I will no longer be around to rais their child...SHE DROVE 2 hours to my house and she told me HER side of the story....

Bottom line...there is always the truth in the middle...and although I can see as to why she fleed, I still can't understand not taking your child away from neglect.

Every story is different and I'm sorry for the long winded response but, what I'm trying to say is...that there were more to her despair that meets the eye.

I no longer hold such contempt towards his ex before me but, I still hurt for the child.

Oh Lordy....I forgot to add. I asked her as to why she fled from her child and everything...she said that she felt like she was about to lose her sanity and felt as though she was unfit to be a mother....she was right....she worked on herself for the years that I was married to him and now my step-son is back living with her and he is thriving....the sad part is that I haven't seen him in two years and most likely, won't see him ever again....

Your stbx might have some issues with your marriage....

doesnt' matter who walks away. the parent that does walk away is the parent that pays child support. i bet she didn't think of that part. as for everything else guys this is a place for keeping things clean not letting each other off.

I can't understand any parent who would abandon his or her children.

I stayed in a crappy marriage because I didn't want to take any chance that my husband would get custody. When my son was of age, I walked and didn't look back.

Lynne

You don't always know or have signs. My husband came home after a year depolyment and said I want a divorce. We had been married for 16 years. It has come out that of course there is someone he was deployed with that he became involved with. Our divorce is not final. This is the most painful thing he has ever done to his family. The kids are the most important right now. Make sure you get counciling for them. Know they are a true gift from God. Remind them everyday that did nothing to MAKE this happen. I pray everyday the pain the girls and I feel will be replaced with peace.

COUGARJG: You wrote " We were perfectly happy for 13 years before this. Anybody's take on this? "
Those are FAMOUS LAST WORDS..".WE were perfectly happy for ___ years...."
I thought so, too, FOR OVER 23 YEARS. Then one day, just a little over 5 years ago, my now X stood up and pretty well devastated me with the "I don't love you anymore; I have no feelings for this marriage anymore" line.
It took nearly 3 months, but then I discovered the TRUTH -- he was already involved with another woman. The rest is a long and bloody story that I won't go into again, BUT my advice to you is to find yourself a good, skilled therapist to help you with the emotional roller coaster you are about to board. Then get a crack shot attorney to settle the financial part.
Be true to yourself and your children! Don't even bother trying to figure out the whys of your wife...it is a complete and total waste of energy.
A marriage requires TWO PEOPLE and it's obvious from her words and actions, that you are the only one in it at this point.
My thoughts and prayers will be with you!