Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
OK, I have been trying to get the rest of my stuff from my ex since March 7th through email, I blocked his number from being able to call me. I asked him then, to let me know when I can come by to pick up, that I did not need or want him to be there, he could leave it somewhere. Well that never happened. he emailed on March 17th asking if I was in the area, I said no. I then decided to make his life and my life easier, I told him he could drop my stuff off at my girlfriends house, who lives right around the corner from his ex wife's house, so when he drops his son off, he could drop my stuff off too. Today is March 26th and he still has not dropped my stuff off? WTF? No, it is not stuff I need right now but, him having my stuff still leaves us unresolved. I want my shit but, all be damn if I am going to his house with him there to get it...
fireserpent
You might just have to make a choice of whats more important to you and you wont be able to get it all the way you hoped. If you need your stuff back for closure then deal with the 20 minutes to face him and go get it. Bring a friend if you need to. If facing him for that long is just to much for you then just replace your stuff and forget about getting it back.
ChiTownBear
I hope you get your stuff back soon.
trisha9054
You can call the local police and get an escort to get your things. If there is a problem with that they can tell you how to go about getting your possessions.
JaniceHayes
Thx guys, police escort not needed was not that type of relationship, one day I will have to bite the bullet and go get. It is 5 things, floor Matt's, leather head rests to my third row of my SUV, open house signs, pajamas and gloves. It must be a control thing, cause I blocked him so, this is his only leverage, that is what my friends are telling me.
deleted_user
Can you have a friend or your room mate go get them for you?
JaniceHayes
That was my point of having him drop it offf at my friends house. I would ask her to go get, but she has 4 kids... My other friends live like 30 miles away. So frustrating.
deleted_user
I think your best bet is to call the police. They are there just to say you have the right to enter the residents home to gather your belongings. My ex wouldnt return my belongings and 8 months later I had enough and called for a police escort to get my things. Otherwise it would have gone to civil court, because he wasnt going to give me what I wanted. I do believe it is a control thing too, I mean why else would they have the need for OUR things?
JaniceHayes
I will give him one more week, then I will reach out again. Police would the absolute, absolute last resort......
deleted_user
How about e-mailing him and telling him you are coming at a certain date and time, and that you would appreciate him not being there. Then take a friend with you.
JaniceHayes
cheryt, I tried that in my first email.
deleted_user
I see that you said you contacted him, but that it didn't work out. Don't ask him for a date, just tell him when you'll be there and follow through (assuming you still have a key). The faster you get through this, the quicker you can get on to re-establishing your own life.
JaniceHayes
No, I gave back the key and he is a firefighter and alternating shifts and I through away his schedule not thinking I would need it.
deleted_user
Oh I see. Well then you are in a bind. You will either have to get the cops involved or just leave it behind if he won't assist you. Sorry, that has to piss you off!
JaniceHayes
For now I will leave it behind.. Having the police is not necessary at this point,. I will send him another email next week.
JaniceHayes
It is strange that for someone who is, "just trying to move on" he has a funny way of showing it. I am the one who cut off all communication by blocking his number and deleting my facebook. I am not the one emailing, I am just replying. Once again, his actions versus his emails are two different things. If you clearly want to move on, then drop my shit off and keep it moving. I am giving him what he wants and I guess that is not good enough.
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