You are so so true about how a split can strip a person of their self worth and all that they believe. It's a confusing, dark, low time. The good news...if you can call it that is that you're going through the exact same thing we all go through. The bad news is to jump to much of a serious relationship right now is doomed to fail for the state you're in. You have to process what happened and slowly work through the grief. The goal is to learn where you came from in the relationship, who you really are now and decide how you are going to get where you want to be. It takes time and sucks at first but slowly gets better. Surround yourself with friends and family to help you through this tough time. Stay busy and start digging into things that used to excite you or find new things. Hang in there-it does get better.

PS-I've been divorced over a year-a brutal one I never saw coming...I've moved on but still have days where I feel a little lost. My ex has virtually turned into a teenager on her own for the first time wannabe-and it's disheartening to learn how she's sunk. There's a part of the old protective husband in me that still feels I'm supposed to fix things...then I snap out of it-perfect example of how I'm otherwise moved on ok but still have things trip me up on rare occasions.

Love, I can completely relate to you. This is a hard place to be in. And it sucks even more when you feel so alone. But one of the things I have had to learn in this time is that we have to be okay with being alone. We need to regroup and learn about ourselves all over again. And we have to understand that we cannot allow our worth and joy to be found in another person. That's giving others way too much control. It's a hard lesson to learn. I'm still processing it. But I do know that I never want anyone to have the power to do this to me again. All I can do right now is just continue to pray that one day I'll be freed of this. I will be praying for us. - Hug

Good advice given above.

Watch this, it's insightful:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k7X7sZzSXYs

I've been there and I'm still there. It so easy to go into hiding. I grave companionship so bad it's not funny. Someone to talk to face to face would be awesome. I've had many lonely nights. Very exhausted mentally and physically. I'm trying though.
Have you tried therapy or divorce group? Very helpful
Stay strong

I guess my husband had way too much control over me then, because my joy (not as much my worth) was found in him. Did I realize it when he was alive? Probably. I told him we need him alive. But he died. Now there's a gaping void...There's also a lesson here that we do need people, and there's no shame in that. "If anyone loves not his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen?"

Thanks guys for you kind word. Your encouragement is greatly appreciated. I shall over come, one step at a time.

Sometimes the darkest periods of your life turn into Bright Life Learning Lessons. By getting quiet with yourself, thinking about your talents and strengths, what you want and don't want in your life now and in the future will bring a feeling of control, where the confusion of ending a relationship leaves behind...give yourself some time to heal, your sadness is real and time does help, although the person will be in your heart, they will no longer pull the strings of your life....you make the decisions and choices of how to move forward....best of luck on your journey~~