Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
My divorce was final in December of 2016. While going through it, I met a woman who reshaped my world. I fell in love, deeply in love. While I felt the words meant something before within my marriage, this was something I was not prepared for. The relationship was complicated by many factors not helped by distance. About 13 months ago, I walked away from the relationship.
In those 13 months I have tried to move on,
move forward. Tried dating, biggest problem, they were not her. A photo of her is in my wardrobe, I talk to it each day. Continuing conversations I have with her. Sounds mental I know.
We spoke awhile ago. I don't make contact. She contacts me when she needs a familiar voice. I find after the calls I miss her more. I miss her voice and her laugh, and so much more. If only I could rewind and not have walked away.
I do not reach out because when I left, her world and mine both exploded. Me walking away may have just sped up that explosion as every time we were together the anguish and waging of each other afterwards grew worse for us.
Still in love with her. Miss her like crazy. So trying to find balance, trying to find calm.
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I'm horrified! I knew my insurance would go up due to getting a new car but I didn't expect it to go up over $2,000. I did have an accident with the snow/ice in the winter. I was just telling my brother that I have had my car since March 2, 2026 and have only spent $75 on an oil change. Now this! I called another insurance company and their quote was over $4,000. I guess I have to pay...
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It's normal to think about a past relationship. Especially if you haven't yet met anyone new. Easy to compare, and to think only of the good times. I think once you meet someone, you won't be thinking about this past relationship the same way. Keep putting yourself out there, keep meeting people, keep dating.
Torontor .... I get it. Hang in there!
Take the photo down out the wardrobe and put it in a box. Take any mementos and put them away. You say you tried to move forward. You tried dating. You haven't. You haven't let go emotionally. You are still connected to her. You've gone on dates but you don't see them really just a comparison to her.
It's hard..very hard but you have to let go. Really let go. I don't mean stop loving her. It just means recognize that relationship is over. You can still cherish what you had. You can still remember her fondly. But you have to go on.
You know what? No-one is going to be her. That's a good thing because she is your ex and it didn't work. You have to be ready to give the new person a chance and it's not fair if you are still connected to the old.
I can say this because held on for a year. I still miss a lady after being broke up 4 years and she is remarried. I miss a narc ex also after a year. It's natural. Especially when we don't have anyone. But who can we met someone and build a relationship if we cling to the past.
I'm not an expert and sorry if this is direct. Don't beat yourself up. We all do it. It's hard letting go of love and dreams. But you aren't being fair to yourself or giving yourself a chance at happiness. And who knows, maybe you two will get together in the future, but that would be a new relationship. Good luck!
I do think though is that you need to stop taking her calls. She wants to hear a familiar voice, but she's going to have to call someone else. I don't know why you walked away, but maybe it was for the best.
And give yourself some time. It took me a good 4 years to get over an unrequited love.