Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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/ Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Husband was Cheating

jokiwhau
jokiwhau

I remember joining this forum back in 2014 when I was going through a divorce after 19 years of marriage.  I got remarried in 2018 and here I am again. I discovered a few weeks back that my husband was cheating both physically with someone as well as sexting multiple other women.  I found this out early July and kept it a secret until he left for a week on a trip.  I spent weeks pretending everything was fine and faking illnesses so he would stay away from me.  When he finally left for his trip, I took that week and moved out into my own apartment.  I called him the day before he was supposed to come home, and he admitted to everything (surprisingly).  I filed the divorce papers 2 days later.  I am devastated and so hurt.  I am scared because now I have to figure stuff out on my own and I am mad because he was supposed to be my forever at this later stage in life.  I think I am done being married again, and I am trying to accept the fact that I will be alone.  Good thing is I have great kids and grandkids, so I am trying to be optimistic.

hasty_05
hasty_05
Change is hard! Now we have to create a new life for ourselves. It’s better to stand up for ourselves than stay and suffer from the abuse of cheating. Anyway, welcome back. I’m sorry this has happened to you. Maybe it is better to not be married than have to deal with cheating. In time, you will find new things in your life. And you won’t be devoting your energy to someone who is so disrespectful and dishonest.

I am remarried and he doesn’t cheat but my first husband was doing drugs and alcohol and cheating at the end. He’d been sexually abusive to me for years but I didn’t understand this was abuse for a long time. I am glad to be done with that marriage as these scumbags really scare our hearts. Come back and let us know how you are doing. Sometimes this group is slow.
jokiwhau
jokiwhau
Thank you!
yendh
yendh
Hugs.
Me too. I'm back here after 9 years. Got married in 2016. The divorce is finalized a few months ago. There was no big reason for my divorce but there were thousands of small issues. I realized that I'm rather alone than being with someone but still lonely right next to him.
Please take times to recover yourself. It's ironical that we're experienced in this.
Syaujye2
Syaujye2
Hang in there. I don’t have magic words but you do… tell yourself you’re strong, deserve better and you’ll make it b
SpeckledDoe
SpeckledDoe
I empathize with you. As older women, we sometimes feel that men only want younger women. In most cases, it does seem to be true, but there is love out there for us “Later Daters.” I hope real love finds you soon.
MrCellophane
MrCellophane
Similar circumstance for me too. I joined DS in 2014 because my wife was having an affair. We separated for 2 years, then reconciled and were together for another ten years or so. And... here I am again. I got a letter from my wife's attorney two days before Christmas, asking me to move out of my home. Maybe we should start our own DS group for recycled members? ;-)
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