My first thought is that if therapy isn't helping, then maybe you need a different therapist and a different therapy modality. Sometimes "talk" therapy only serves to continue to keep the wounds open.

Honestly, the only way thru this horrible process is to allow yourself to feel the feelings as they come up. Of course you can't always do that right at the moment, because of work, etc. But you can keep a small notebook in your purse, car, desk, etc. and write out key words/thoughts at that moment. It doesn't have to be complete sentences.

Also there is a great website by Julia Cameron & on it there are instructions for writing morning/mourning pages.
http://juliacameronlive.com/basic-tools/morning-pages/

I am not a dr. but I have had migraines and none of the dr's I've been to over the years ever suggested an anti-d for them. Please consider seeing your physician and tell them it's not helping and ask to try something else.

Plus if you don't need an anti-d, it could be that even a low dose is SUPRESSING your emotions which might contribute to the obsessiveness, especially if you haven't experienced it before starting. IMHO, drs tend to hand out anti-d's like candy w/o having the knowledge or experience to be prescribing for psychological issues. Also anti-d's have lots of side effects and obsessiveness could be one of them, especially if the dose is too high (which means if your brain chemistry isn't out of balance, you don't need one at all!)

The other thing is that many people get dx'd w/depression when they are actually grieving because the sx are so similar. And, anti-d's tend to dumb down our feelings. With grief, we can't heal if we don't feel. Actually that is true for any emotional issue. So you might want to get a 2nd opinion from a therapist not in the same office/group as the one you're seeing now.

Besides journaling, meditation & a daily gratitude can be life changing. When we practice gratitude, it changes the focus of what we see from negative to positive. It takes a while to build up, but it really works. That's because what we focus on expands, so each time you get an obsessive thought, stop and write down something you're grateful for.

As for the texts and emails. I so get the temptation to read and reread. I did it for a long time. And, I understand that you may need them. So, talk to your attorney and ask if you can forward them to him/her and one other trusted friend fore safe keeping and then delete them from your phone/email.

Please take good care of you by being kind and gentle w/yourself and allowing yourself to feel and honor your feelings.

~healing hugs~

During the divorce process I went on long drives after work and/or walks in the woods with headphones blasting music.

It's OK to be ambivalent and distressed at this time. You will get through it!

It's way better once it's over and you can start healing as an individual. letting go--even when it is the rightest ting you'll ever do, is still hard.

I tend to leave extra early for work , sit in my car and just think things through in my mind, what do I need to do today? Where does my divorce process stand ? What is priority right now ? I just basically talk to myself in my mind and try to answer my own questions. I tend to feel better before work after I have my goals in check. Then I tell myself I am entering another world, work. I will focus , make a living ( we all need to make money and have a job) sometimes it is an hour sometimes two hours just thinking and playing my games on my phone in between thoughts. I do this for about a half hour in the car after work too. It helps me stay focused. I have to be my own best friend when it comes to this , is what I say to myself.

for over a year I did what you do....and still do to some extent....but much much less now

i think it cannot be avoided .....as you are so in the thick of it

I did it at work also

i have therapy...was on antidepressants....and used all the resources and help i could get....took a great breakups and divorce course

But when so in love with someone and committed for eternity.....It takes a very long time to disconnect from that attachment

hang in there.....talk to your supporters

Eventually your new life will be more important than your old life

I too obsess over things. Fortunately, my job keeps me busy enough that I do not have time to obsess too much at work. My worst time is in bed. I think about everything I'm losing, the missed opportunities, the broken dreams, the uncertain future. I get panic attacks sometimes. For awhile, I'd been staying up late, till 2 AM sometimes, watching movies, working, fixing kids toys, online xmas shopping, playing Fallout 4, anything to keep me up until I literally pass out. Just so I don't have to think about the divorce too much.

Things are getting better now. I'm still keeping myself busy until about midnight. I still get some panic attacks, but the keeping myself busy has helped.

I too have panic attacks

The only way I have been able to sleep these last two years is to take Lorazepam every night

I would send all the texts and emails to a flash drive and then delete them. I had a folder of my ex wife's emails that went back years and years...I just deleted it as I didn't need it anymore. Later I sold our rings. Eventually I gave up any communication with her (together 24 years) and ignore anytime she texts and or emails. This took a LONG time, well over a year...slowly erasing the past. I used to wake up every morning at 3am and just mull it all over in my head. Now after almost 2 years it's way better. I still think of her but not obsessively and I certainly would never go back. In time it gets easier, but it's a slow process detaching.

I definitely feel your pain. Having it in your head sucks! Like others, I can say that it gets better over time. Loud music is helpful...

kbbcoop reminded me of how empowering it felt when I told my Ex this year that I would NEVER take her back

Then I demanded the divorce telling her I am disgusted being married to her and that I deserve better

I got my POWER back

((((Debbie))))) hugs. I am praying for you and this very difficult situation. I did counseling, but what helped me the most was walking. I signed up for a 5k walk/run. I had a goal to press towards and being outdoors help to relieve some the stress and strain. Doing things with your friends or family, even if you don't really feel festive. Volunteer for something u enjoy doing. Example, a animal shelter, or human shelter or reading a book to child at your local library.
Oh, and writing down my thoughts really helped to release some of the power of my thoughts.