she's been gone since April. it has not gotten any easier. i try to keep making plans for weekend get aways, projects to finish ect..ect..but it is tough. they say in time it gets better. im still waiting to find out exactly how much time it takes..

How I handle loneliness:

Make myself get off the couch.

Clean the house.

Ride my motorcycle.

Hit a bar for a beer (hadn't done that in 10 years) but make sure I talk on the cell the entire time so I don't have to interact with folks there (just my insecurity in that setting I guess, but this particular bar has great food)

My latest craze - bought a book of magic tricks you can do with common items and in office, small group settings. Figure I will teach them to my son. Should be great conversation starters. (Maybe I can get off the phone in the bar.)

Write out lists of things to do.
Try to get things done off that list.

Vent, vent, vent, vent, vent, vent

Did I say vent?

Check out this site two times a day.

Call my sister who was in a wreck.

Count the days until my son gets here for 10 months. yooo hoooo!!

Stack bricks

Sleep whenever I can.

I think you get the picture.

Keeping busy is best but I know there is a proper time of greiving your relationship and that is OK and normal. There is no set time either so don't feel bad about the sadness that comes to you. Have a good cry when you feel the need and try each day to move forward in some area. Not that it is easy. I still have not cleaned out the master BD closet. I know I need to but just have not brought myself to. My stbx is trying to buy another house so I guess when he has a place to put it all then?? Also tonight I watched a love story by myself. Why did I do that?? Longing for companionship and human touch is normal but we have to be strong and resist if that touch comes in the form of venom!

I don't think there is any set time to grieve. In my case it is not over completly. I think my wife wants to come back but I am setting some guide lines. No more lying, we as a family come first before her daughter, grandchildren etc and respect for me and NO more nagging. In the past when she took off I sat here and pined for her but I think I have become more self assured. No more her coming back in a month and nothing changes. I am going to set some boundaries. In a way it would be easier if it was over or she was dead. The only option would be to move forward. I am in kind of a limbo. Unless she can meet these conditions I don't want her back. I guess I have periods of lonliness but I think this is OK.

Jolly ya sound like me!..LOL
Why don't ya vent a little?? :)
Venting is great and I only logged onto this site yesterday and it's so nice to have a place to vent and people that actually listen to what you have to say!!!

I truly understand. It's been a year and a half for me. Keeping busy is key. I took on a really big project at my loneliest point. I redecorated the entire inside of the house that helped me a lot. Took out all the wallpaper we put up together, painted every room different, even sold the furniture we picked out together so that I would remove anything that reminded me of the past life I shared with him. It has been great therapy and the house is now the way I like it instead of a home we shared! Keep busy and focus on your needs. If after all that you still can't find love enough to want to work things out with your STBX then move on. If you find that there is something life to work on then man work like hell to put it back together. Time apart is a great way of sorting things out. Good luck.