Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
7 months separated 5 panic attacks
a day. What is the best anti anxiety
drug that works the fastest can't take weeks of side effects before it helps
thanks
But you'll feel better in 10 minutes
I have divorce related anxiety, depression and Stress.
Its low level, no attacks, no real need for drugs just
to move thru it, face it and let it go eventually, HUGS
It can truly be excruciatingly insane for some of us.
Of course,. the downside is that because they work so well and "cure" the problem, one gets complacent and two or three months later when you try to stop them you're amazed that you can't
Especially if you've never had a problem before.
Benzos are hell and there are times when I probably could use one, but I
will not risk it.
Trying natural alternatives
I don't think any of us here is a professional, so your very question cannot be answered by us, and even if it is, you MUST ignore us and seek an expert. Do NOT self medicate, much less with something as strong as anti-depressants. Dandelion is right; many (but not all) of these drugs have extremely strong withdrawal effects. They will put you through an artificial hell.
But let's see what's going on: did you suffer relatively regularly from anxiety before the breakup?
If not, then you have to understand that it is the breakup causing this to you. It may well be that you're in a situation that would benefit from antidepressants, but have you done the typically recommended things? Here's some of the most obvious ones:
- Go FULL-BLOWN NO CONTACT with your ex. Nothing! No contact! ZERO! And no excuse, no we-need-to-sort-out-health-insurance, no I-need-to-get-my-things-from-her, no I-found-her-earring-in-the-car, not even signing divorce papers. Do everything through third parties. Most friends would be happy to help with this if they see it will help you. You don't need to keep appearances, you just need to keep your head on your shoulders.
- Go out and meet new people, even when you don't want to go out. Try joining groups on meetup.com, couchsurfing.com, or anything local. Don't argue with me, just go! Yes, you may and probably will feel even more miserable the first times you go, and you might even fear having a break down in public. But so what if that happens? You just tell people what's going on if you feel like it, and I bet you they'll understand and support you even if they've just met you.
- Go to the cinema, on your own. Yes, it will be truly horrid, and you'll want to leave the theatre mid-way, and everything will remind you of everything... just soldier on, you can do this! If you eventually do have to get out mid-way, then do, go to the restroom, wash your face, maybe get a chocolate, then try to go back in. Get an aisle seat just so you can go out if necessary.
- Pester your friends with text (not calls). They can always just not reply if they're busy or think you're getting overly repetitive. Never triangulate common friends with your ex and particularly never EVER triangulate your ex's family, you will almost always lose even if you're right. We're only human after all.
- Read self help and break-up books. I've found Susan Elliott's "Getting Past your Break-up" extremely helpful. I'm on my second read now. Just read them over again and again, they do help. I used to mock self-help disdainfully and even with pity for the people who read it... ... karma is a b*tch. The thing works, if you're willing to do the work, and admittedly it can be hard work. But it does help. A lot!
- Work out regularly. Again, you'll feel terrible at first, but it will help you get back up. It may not feel that way the first few times, but it will help you.
- Pick up a new hobby or resume an old one.
- Numb yourself with silly SciFi series/movies, Sherlock Holmes books, self-help blogs and books, or whatever works for you. This won't stop the attacks entirely, but it will very likely make them less frequent.