I'm so sorry that you are going through this. For anyone to just walk away from a marriage with no explanation is wrong and beyond hurtful. I pray things get better for you..

Thank you, I appreciate your prayers

I understand your pain. My husband left 9 days ago and moved 3000 miles away. I was blindsided too and have tried to make sense of all of this. He also says he has not been happy for the past three year but has no real reasons how he was not happy and in fact says he loves me and loves our life together. Truth is he cheated on me with a so called "friend" and just up and left me and his entire life behind to go be with her. Saying he has not been happy for 3 years I totally believe is what he is saying to convince not only himself but others as it sounds better than the truth.

It is going to be a tough road ahead and it will take time to get thru this but both you and I can do this as we deserve better. Take care of you!

you are absolutely not alone

have a look at my journals where I share many lessons learned along my own personal journey

stay strong! it does get better, i promise

Thank you everyone for reaching out , I find some comfort in knowing there are people out there experiencing similar struggles . I find myself trying to torture myself thinking about what he said or did or torturing myself through social media seeing him moving forward completely fine.. I want the pain to stop .

Sorry for your pain. His habit has alot to do with it I am sure but either way it's hard and will take time.

I am sorry for your pain and unhappiness. Moving forward is the only way to make the pain go away and regain a happy life.

That being said, there have probably been signs and indications of his waning interest over the last three years. And if you are completely honest with yourself, you will probably come to see that you ignored them because addressing them might have spoiled your plans for your future - dating for a couple of years, then married happily ever after. It is difficult to acknowledge that things may not be headed in the right direction, especially after you have already invested a couple years with someone.

Also, do you really want to be married to a cocaine addict? Even in the best of marriages, addiction just leads to unhappiness...

OK, so he "fell out of love" the same time he started "abusing cocaine heavily".

His explanation may have not been spoken honestly - "fell out of love" is not a true answer IMO, and maybe he doesn't even have a grasp as to why he does what he does. This all points to issues that HE has, not you, but you're left to pick up the pieces of your broken heart anyway. So sorry for this to be happening to you, but can you imagine spending the rest of your life, and raising children with a drug abuser? He has perhaps saved you from decades of pain by leaving now.

Also, don't believe he's happily moved on. He's still using, and that doesn't indicate a person is all well and good. He's suffering from something(s) and using drugs to escape from it. He's in a sorry state, but you just worry about getting yourself back together. You'll get there.

I hear what your saying , but there may have been signs and yes were there arguments and stuff absolutely . But never did he sit down and say to me I am not happy this is going to work. Two months ago he made me get off my birth control to “prepare” my body to have a baby, he said 2018 is the year for us to buy a hous and a have a kid .... so many mixed messages contradicting statements and now all he has to say is pretty much it was all bs . How does a person wrap their head around all of this. He pretty much Took everything put it on me and just left ..... it’s all on me . No accountability for making the choices he made..and the hurtful things not he said when he was telling me he no longer loved me . How can someone do that to a person .... I feel alone I feel like I’ll never find happiness or someone who will love me for who I am as a person, which he did not

Jojored. I totally understand what your saying , he claimed the last we spoke when he told me all this that he was the clearest he had been in months bc he wasn’t using ... but he also said at another point via text that he always was successful in his life on drugs and he enjoys and wants to be able to drink and do drugs if he wants to. I don’t really know at this point what parts of our relationship were real or drug driven .... he even had the nerve to say how many times do you think during our intimate moments I wasn’t high.... he told me I was naive and blind because I didn’t even realize what he was doing right in front of my face ..... I am so hurt . How could someone do such a thing , and then almost put the blame on someone else . I keep talking and then I feel like I stop making sense because I keep trying to make sense of it all ...

Hang in there! I know this is difficult, but you are stronger than you think. You are beautiful, wonderful woman that everyone loves to be around. This too shall pass; this is only a season. Take care of yourself; physically and emotionally.
Good luck! I wish you all the best.