Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
All my experience says I should be feeling somewhat better by now. The pain shouldn't be so sharp, I shouldn't be crying everyday, I should start to resume "normal" actvities like watching tv, listening to music, taking a shower. I should be able to clean my apt and not have it look like a pig sty the next day. I should be able to move on to other things in my life. I just can't. I'm just absolutely too broken up, too depressed about this.
I loved him so much. More than any man I've ever loved. The year and a half before he cheated was the best time of my life. I was looking forward to our future. Hell, I woke up looking forward to every day. I truly felt that, for once, I got it right.
At first I was so angry, and so full of adrenaline that I was super woman. Throw the bum out, get rid of the reminders, block him from my life. The first week or so I was amazed at how tough I was being. I felt empowered. Oh, I cried and all that, but that was to be expected, after all, I did deeply care about him, but I was plowing through the devastation.
More recently, though...I feel like I'm falling apart. A little more each day. Every day there's a little less of me that wants to stick around for this crap of a life. OK, I have the added stress of my daughter's problems and illness on top of this, but at the end of the day it's missing him, missing our life, missing my dreams that is really tearing at me. It's realizing that he's gone that punches me in the chest each morning. It's all the little stupid things that happen each day, like finding something of his, or hearing a song that tears at me that start me crying. Last night I found myself thinking that if I died, the money my daughter got would pay off her debts and drs bills, and, with her aunt and brother's help help her turn her life around. And wouldn't that be worth it? This life I have sucks. It's too empty, too lonely, too painful, and I don't see it getting better, no matter what I try. Wouldn't it be better to give my daughter a chance to be happy? Wouldn't saving her mean more than me just feeling empty the rest of my life?
I'm not thinking of hurting myself, but hey, if I was hit by a bus or something.....wouldn't that be better for everyone than me walking around feeling half dead?
You are just using your thoughts as a resource to seek to find out what to do best. I've had my own similar thoughts, and all people have such self-actualizing ideas. You are the image of the common human. :-) And you only wish to learn what to do with your problems; no harm in that, and this is quite smart behavior, expectable. The good thing is that you are not telling that you are strongly guided to do something senseless or rash either. It is so clear that you have a personal way of studying out your situation. And I look at it as self-therapy, which is a workbook type of thoughtful tools for that in the moment trouble-shooting thinking.
Best to you. You are stronger than the eye can see.
Much goodly feelings are sent to you today...
In my circumstance, my son is what caused me to end my relationship with my ex. It was the hardest thing I have ever hard to do because I loved that man. I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. I am just one year out and I still struggle. I have a hard time remembering the bad.
I had all the thoughts you did. My friends are what saved me. Cry when you need too. Be angry when you need to. Your daughter needs you.
Here as a friend to you anytime. Virtual hugs sent your way
Okay,. Let me tell you why you are hurting soooooooooooooooooooooo bad- and its bad
because you have a number of posts. Okay- you are focusing from the outside in. Your looking at what he did, what he meant what he said what your missing about him. What about you, Why exactly after all this
time and after your marriages is there a pattern? What is going on deep inside of you?. Because there
is something going on. Why are you still partnering with pain and not self partnering with yourself to
guide you out of pain. Do you have a photo of yourself- the cutest one you can find.Put in on your night table.
Look at it. Hold it and talk to her. Tell her what you are sorry for- what happened when you were younger-
any issues with abandonment-What about yourself were you skeptical about? Let me tell you girl- Your
marriages and relationships are more so to reveal things within YOU, not the other person. You should
be wondering about you and being at peace with and within yourself. Being honest and upfront with yourself.
About the picture in the frame. Look at the picture- and know that you are accountable to her. Tell her you
love her and if you made any bad choices out of fear or deep rooted child issues that you are willing to
take a look at these things , uproot them, discard them and tell yourself that it is okay . The Universe is
actually waiting on you-.There are reasons that we have co-dependency issues. For me it is actually
because I have empathetic tendencies.I can be overly sensitive. You have - because we all have to do inner
work. Talking to that picture of yourself and loving her first and uncovering her deepest fears is called self partnering. Uprooting these fears can be done with Quantum Healing. You cannot hold onto emotional residue
especially if the Universe did not ordain the union. This means that it is rightly so for him to embark on his
journey and to release you and it is rightly so for you to embark on your journey and for you to release him.
You cant be grabbing on emotionally and frantically and expect to have open ready arms to allow the Universe
to gift you for what is yours. Embark on your personal journey to self heal and self partner with love. You get over these things but the method is self loving yourself through it. If you love yourself and know that you are worth it then stop crying- Open your loving arms and Release him back into the universe bravely.Create
this affirmation and then the Universe will follow you- because now you are in you guessed it Perfect Alignment. A beautiful life and journey lies ahead please for your beautiful sake please dont make the mistake
to miss out.Love Hugs Positive Vibes, Healing, Bright Energy, your way
Osheana