Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
yeah i'm over him alright....
but i'm still healing from the emotional abuse. he always tried to mentally / psychologically manipulate me.
for instance when he's not getting his way, he would make these threats to me that would be demeaning or supposed to make me feel bad.
for example:
when i was telling him on the phone last week to leave me alone for good, he said i was becoming a bad person and that i shouldn't do this to him. his reasons were that in the past i have done bad things to him and he to me, so we are even. he also told me that if i decided to eliminate him from my life, he will chose to remember me only for all the wrong i have done. and that our relationship was shit. his words were "fine, you wanna be this way? then i'll only remember you for the bad things you have done and the cold hearted person you are!" he went on and on about it but i never took the bait or the guilt trip he tried. plus, once i got off the phone i put a block on his number.
during our relationship, he always did things like this to me. he would speak to me like i was supposed to do time for crimes or something. you know, to try and get his way.
i know i'm a much better person than he says i am, and he was just projecting most of the time. but i can't help it that i'm scarred.
anyone else go through something like this? or any other similar abuse?
but i'm still healing from the emotional abuse. he always tried to mentally / psychologically manipulate me.
for instance when he's not getting his way, he would make these threats to me that would be demeaning or supposed to make me feel bad.
for example:
when i was telling him on the phone last week to leave me alone for good, he said i was becoming a bad person and that i shouldn't do this to him. his reasons were that in the past i have done bad things to him and he to me, so we are even. he also told me that if i decided to eliminate him from my life, he will chose to remember me only for all the wrong i have done. and that our relationship was shit. his words were "fine, you wanna be this way? then i'll only remember you for the bad things you have done and the cold hearted person you are!" he went on and on about it but i never took the bait or the guilt trip he tried. plus, once i got off the phone i put a block on his number.
during our relationship, he always did things like this to me. he would speak to me like i was supposed to do time for crimes or something. you know, to try and get his way.
i know i'm a much better person than he says i am, and he was just projecting most of the time. but i can't help it that i'm scarred.
anyone else go through something like this? or any other similar abuse?
Thank God you blocked his calls....that is a good start in stopping the bad messages ((((((((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))
a few weeks before we split up, he broke a bunch of my juice glasses and my salt and pepper shaker too. the glass was all over the kitchen. he through them across the kitchen in a fit of rage. so i know what you mean by it got scary!
He is doing this to you because his ego can't handle that you told him to leave him alone, I've done that before the fight can go on for hours, God forbid if I dont' want to be with you anymore, i have that right. You don't own me, chalk it up to experience, I am so proud of you for standing your ground, your smart, and a good head on your shoulder's, you definately don't need a man like that bringing you to his level.
Take care of you.
Hopefully he is gone now and wont' be able to throw your shit,
I remember one time, I was on the toilet, and mine hauled off and slapped me and i fell to the ground and almost passed out.
youarenotcrazy.com
all the other "wrong things" i supposedly did, he took pieces of what ACTUALLY happened and blew them way out of proportion to make me sound bad. he is pretty paranoid and gets these notions in his head that everyone wants to hurt him. so, he'll take anythin i say and turn it into i was trying to hurt him. THAT's another thing that scarred me. that day i told him to leave me alone, i kept telling him over and over that i NEVER had any intentions of ever physically hurting him, but he said other wise.
sending some support- it takes a good long while to sort yourself out after being emotionally abused for any length of time. just remember to go easy on yourself, ok?
maybe they DO have a manual for this shit! what is it "DIY Emotional Abuse for dummies" or something? gee.....
The yelling for hours, following me around when I would leave the room, being threatening and intimidating if I tried to leave, being cornered, making sure I had no option but to stay and "take it" for hours...OMG...I remember those times all to well too.
The upside at this point is the quiet, the peace, the absence of drama is SO BIG in my life and my heart, I love love love it.
And you will most certainly get to that point too.
You're detoxifying. It's an unpleasant but really good thing.
hang in there