Don't look back, run!! If you have to work that hard in the beginning and their is a history of infidelity, I would head for the hills.

Ranger, I'm sorry, but I fail to see how this person would be good for you. So I vote both run and no contact so you don't wait around for her to change her mind. Staying involved with her won't allow you to be available when the right one comes along. I feel that isn't what you wanted to hear, but you asked for an opinion so take it for what it's worth.

RUN she will just do the same to you.
My father tried to tell my sister that was dating a married man who 'slept on the couch while divorcing' he would do it to her.
That man left 1 # one for my sister. Left my sister who is #2 for another woman and you get the pic. He is on wife #4 or 5 now. And the saddest? At least 6 children with no father.
Run I say. RUN fast. You have training. Use it! And I am not kidding.

Another vote for: RUN! Run like the wind!

Sorry for your situation! :(

Run honey run... been there done that

I've learned-

That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its place. No one can ever love me the way I deserve if I dont love myself. That true friendship continues to grow over the longest distance, and the same goes for true love

I've learned-

That you cannot make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved. That it takes years to build up my trust, and only seconds to destroy it. The rest is up to them that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back.

I've learned-

That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean that they don't love each other, and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.


I've learned-

That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time. That we don't have to change friends, if we understand that friends change. That no matter how good your friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while, and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned

That it isn't always good enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you must learn to forgive yourself. That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. That no matter how bad a heart is broken; the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned-

That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for whom we become. That it's taking me a long time to become the person that I want to be. That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.


I've learned-

That you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what tragedy it would be if they believed it. That you should alwaysleave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.


I've learned-

That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you. That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you are down will be the ones to help you get back up.


I've learned-

That either you control your attitude or it controls you. That you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you better know something. That you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do. That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.


I've learned-

That you can keep going long after you think you can't. That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. That even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned-

That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. That it's not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that counts. That the people you care about the most in life are taken from you too soon That money is a lousy way of keeping score.


I've learned-

That its hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting someones feelings or standing up for what you believe. That sometimes when I get angry I have the right to be angry, but it doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I've learned-

Mistakes are lifes lessons I didnt learn the first time around. That life's lessons never end and wisdom can always be passed on. That no matter what happens to me on earth or how much my faith falters, the Great Spirits faith in me never dwindles or fails.

Sounds like a few situations I got myself in to over the last couple of years.

Walk away, my friend. if her track record isn't enough, her playing tug of war with your head and heart should be.

It saddens me to hear this, Im really sorry for your pain.

Im afraid I would have to say to run too. It hurts like hell, but I may have to subscribe to the philosophy that the past is a pretty good indicator of the future in this situation.

I wish you discernment, and the absolute best.

what's your gut telling you?

hmmmmm the gut ...and the heart ....says wait this out....see what happens....but the head says RUN hahaha

not making any rash decisions sounds cautious enough

do you feel at risk of anything?

Hmmmm well certainly by waiting this out I don't feel any real risk, as long as I stay diciplined and maintain no contact. The risk though...and it's pretty big...is getting her back...then losing her again...which is worse then getting her back to begin with.

it sounds like you've got it well thought out already

RUN!

Ranger,

The person you are describing sounds like someone with commitment issues. She sounds selfish, and prone to cheat on anyone she is with.

My advice would be to cut your losses and move on. I mean think about it she was married, had an affair during her engagement, short marriage, back to the guy she had an affair with, and then you. Doesn't seem like this woman knows what she wants. She has underlining issues that I don't believe you would want to get yourself involved with.

I wish you the very best, and hope you make the right choices for yourself. Lots of sunshine your way and ((hugs)). Sorry, you had to go through this.

Speaking from experience with something similar. Walk away, really. She needs to do her. You need to do you.