Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Fighting sadness

Rman
Rman
I think it is hard as hell to fight the feelings of sadness. Not just breakup/divorce sadness, but all sadness. If you fight it, though, the feeling will drop from a lump in your throat, to a sick stomach feeling that will eventually go away. You have to fight it, though. The shit is hard. I'm trying to fight it now. But, I will make sure that I take the pain I go through and make myself a stronger person. I hope I can do it...pain is a bitch...
deleted_user
deleted_user
Rman, i think we can all disguise pain one way or another, basically for me i just get myself busy and try to avoid the pain... the hurt... i know that if i start to think about it i will cry... i dont like crying, i get sick when i cry because i keep my feelings all bottled up inside me, why? because people expect me to be this strong person, who didnt fall after the divorce, who is able to go thru her teen daughters pregnancy like nothing ever happened... and now my mother has passed away and i find myself not being able to cry... i ask myself is this normal? or have i just fooled myself too long that i dont know how to fell anymore? In all honesty i wish i could cry, scream, throw things, aaaaahhhhhh... just do something but no, u'll catch me right now sitting in front of 20 students taking a test and all they see is this calm person in front of them.... i dont know what u should do, but i do know what ur feeling...
deleted_user
deleted_user
You are worth fighting for! Your heart, mind, and soul are worth fighting for. If you feel that you are exhusted from fighting tag one of us and we will get in the ring for you! Hang in there and don't ever stop trying!
Roadrunner99
Roadrunner99
I did not see anyone mention prayer or meditation.

Prayer often works for me to get to acceptance and go with the flow. I have to do this especially when "fighting" causes my brain to go into a negative cyclone. I have to break the cyclone, especially when driving. (Rman ... Sometimes I can't get up and walk around.)

Walking helps me as well. I walk about 2 miles or more. That seems to improve my thoughts and my ability to focus.

... no pain ... no gain
kdMac
kdMac
Rman- I can really add nothing more than has already been said so I will just send along hugs and a bit of faith for brighter days ahead.... and just a little echo that it truly is healthy to allow yourself to cry/grieve... it is often very healing.... You're in my thoughts...K
deleted_user
deleted_user
Sometimes you have to fight it, other times, I think its okay to surrender to the feelings. Its pretty carthic to feel it all and just let it go.

I found journaling to be a good way to process the pain.

Hugs, Rman.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I prefer humor to the god awful pain, too. And I get what you are saying about distracting yourself to make it through the day, but find some time to let it out when you can. It has been catching up with me at odd moments because no time here with taking care of kids all day..