Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Guys, I am writing this post because I have noticed the large amounts of drama that occur here. Some of it is very natural because all of us are going through hard times. We are all suffering in our own ways. It doesn't matter who is suffering the worst or who is having the worst day. What matters most is that we are all suffering together and we need to come together as a group to uplift those who are having a bad day and be an anchor for those that feel like they are lost at sea.
I have been slightly detached from this place a little bit more because of the personel drama that I am trying to iron out with my job. It is putting my very life in jeapordy because my blood pressure is out of control. I am taking measures to combat this problem and I am trying to find another job, quick. I have already posted about my current issues and if you have any questions feel free to ask them.
The point of this post is that I am tired of the way that people are treating each other. I do not want to argue with people anymore because I am stressed enough in real life. I don't want to see people throwing personel attacks back and forth. There are always more than one approach to solve a problem and there isn't just one right answer. Constructive criticism is a good thing, but negative criticism is a poison that sickens the whole group. I will freely admit that I have been part of some of this and I have voiced fustrations before too. The end point is that we all need to monitor ourselves and bite our lip sometimes.
It all boils down to the old addage "If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all."
I feel that I have recovered from my pending divorce. At this point I am coming on here for my friends that I have found on here, to help other people move along though this horrible process, and support for the other things in my life.
Lets all treat eachother like we would want to be treated. I realize that some of us have bad days but we need to try to realize that we are having a bad day and watch what we say when we are in that situation.
I have been slightly detached from this place a little bit more because of the personel drama that I am trying to iron out with my job. It is putting my very life in jeapordy because my blood pressure is out of control. I am taking measures to combat this problem and I am trying to find another job, quick. I have already posted about my current issues and if you have any questions feel free to ask them.
The point of this post is that I am tired of the way that people are treating each other. I do not want to argue with people anymore because I am stressed enough in real life. I don't want to see people throwing personel attacks back and forth. There are always more than one approach to solve a problem and there isn't just one right answer. Constructive criticism is a good thing, but negative criticism is a poison that sickens the whole group. I will freely admit that I have been part of some of this and I have voiced fustrations before too. The end point is that we all need to monitor ourselves and bite our lip sometimes.
It all boils down to the old addage "If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all."
I feel that I have recovered from my pending divorce. At this point I am coming on here for my friends that I have found on here, to help other people move along though this horrible process, and support for the other things in my life.
Lets all treat eachother like we would want to be treated. I realize that some of us have bad days but we need to try to realize that we are having a bad day and watch what we say when we are in that situation.
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
Right now I see the problem as the usually high flying emotions that are just naturally going to be part of this group. Also the approach of the Holiday season and the economy are adding to the stresses of EVERYONE (not just in this group but people in general).
I've come to think of us all as a very large dysfunctional family. That said I also believe that the written word is easy to misinterpret. There is no tone, no inflection, no gesticulation or facial expression to differentiate between sarcasm, wit/humor and "tough love". It takes a while to get to know people here. Vac for instance is ALWAYS up for sarcastic humor, Pasta is pretty good at it and JacJac's wit and humor alternates with her "tough love" approach.
Sometimes we need to look beyond t he words, to the person typing them.
Just my 2 cents. By the way, why did old typewriters have the "cents sign" and computer keyboards don't?????????
I think we should let the negative posts die instead of responding to them.
I agree that tempers will sometimes flare but we need to remember to respect opinions, even if we don't agree with them.
I hope your blood pressure is better; I know you're dealing with a lot right now.
Thanks for the reminder to be civil--words we can all live by.
We are all in pain in one way or another, and to echo the other posts here, the stress of the economy and the holidays are only adding to it.. but instead of lashing out at one another we really should be helping one another through the confusion and the hell that we are all experiencing..
I am also pretty much over my break up, I log in mostly to laugh with, and check on a few amazing people Ive met on this site.. If I see a thread that takes me back to the mess I was a yr ago, I try to help that person see there is a light at the end of the tunnel..
The useless bickering is just pathetic
No really I agree, but this board is like a big huge family. There are going to be times of drama. This isn't a fantasy world. It's hundreds of people hurting and healing. It's like fighting over a will or something. We stand strong beside each other when we need it. Sometimes it's tough love but not what we wouldn't give our friends face to face. For me, anything I type are words that I would say to any of my friends.
So, though we have drama, we have to remember the keys of why we are here. Which is we are all hurt, sad, lonely, and disappointed for one thing or another. We are going to fight, end of story because we are FAMILY!
With all this going on, this place should be a refuge away from life's stresses, where you tell others about your issues and think about what you can do next to deal with them. We all want to be right, and we all want to feel better about ourselves. But I think we all need to face the reality that none of us knows everything, and has just as much chance of being wrong about anything.
I agree with Heave that we should all give each other a break. Not just during the holiday season, but always!
I hope everyone here has a peaceful and happy holiday season!
Support, compassion, empathy and the benefit of knowing that there are people who are going through what you are and people that have survived what you are going through...those are the things that should be found here.