Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I just found out today that she has already filed for the divorce. She filed on monday. I am so cunfused. I have tried to ask her for counseling, but she will not go. She continually blames me for everything. I want to get an attorney, but i cannot afford the 2000 retainer fee. i still have not seen my children or heard from them. It is very hard to focus on myself right now. I want her to try to help this out, but she still is just done. I feel so bad right now. I am losing the one person in my life that i love the most. i keep playing the 'only if' game over and over in my head.... only if i got help sooner, only if she will go to counsleing with me, only if she cared, only if i changed earlier.... just makes me feel worse. I still am a loser with no job. A wife who hates me, children who will grow to hate me too. Why? WHY? I regret doing my time in the marines. This is not what i wanted my life or marriage to come down to. I keep thinking to myslef, why try anymore? I hate myself for getting into this crap myself. I DID THIS! I was the asshole who pushed her away. ANd there is nothing that i can do!!!! Is this what god wants? Is this how i am repayed for doing what i wanted to do with my life? I chose to join the marines. i wanted to serve. Because of my service, i got treated like shit and was diagnosed with PTSD. FOR WHAT???? HAVE I BEEN THAT BAD OF A HUSBAND? she never has run to me with any problems. She runs to her mom and dad as always. i hate that. I had no idea this was going to happen like this. I would have changed sooner. i tried to change before, but fell through the cracks and kept doing the stupid crap. I got stupid ass jobs that i hated. I cannot find a job that i want to keep that is worth my time. i wanted to be a cop, but nobody is flipping hiring. I dont even know if i could do that, and still show my wife that i am ther for her. She left because i was never there. i worked my ass off for a company that didnt pay me. I tried to start up a security company with a few guys i know, and that didnt pan out. I WASTED 3 FLIPPING MONTHS, and now have lost my wife because of it. Why cant i do the right things? Why cant i be the man she wants and needs? I JUST DONT KNOW ANYMORE!!!! I was just served....
As hard as it is right now, there is free legal help. Google it - I'm sure there are many who would LOVE to feel patriotic and help out an ex-marine. I've posted on sights and get e-mails - lawyers have to do a quota of free help. My town had a divorce packet, also I got connected to an advocate who got my divorce fee waived (though I didn't go thru w it and just want to be honest).
If you have put so much into trying to get your feet off the ground and she's abandoning your relationship over the material then she lacks substance.
If you have PTSD I hope you're getting treatment. You are not the cause, you are the victim of circumstance, and being a Marine must make you feel you're not "a man" if you show your vulnerability. Tear down the wall, my friend. Your post here is a good step. Much love.
Please don't be so hard on yourself