Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Today I learned something new: a nice, sweet profile with open heart is most of the time looked over and labeled as cliche.
It did not occur to me that, aside from the difficulty of finding someone, there is also the new type of "resume": not only you are "selling" yourself as different but also you need to put in there somewhat of a perspective of what you aim in 5 to 10 years towards of life.
Out of curiosity, what does your dating profile say, and if you don't have one, what would you like to say that could call attention from someone who wants what you want (a friend, company, partner for ice cream)?
It did not occur to me that, aside from the difficulty of finding someone, there is also the new type of "resume": not only you are "selling" yourself as different but also you need to put in there somewhat of a perspective of what you aim in 5 to 10 years towards of life.
Out of curiosity, what does your dating profile say, and if you don't have one, what would you like to say that could call attention from someone who wants what you want (a friend, company, partner for ice cream)?
Thought i met a nice man - who turned out to be a scam artist.
He actually called today to ask for financial help. We haven't even been talking for a week yet. I called this one before it even happen.
If we don't meet out somewhere like back before computers even existed. Then I guess it's just not meant to be.
i took my profile down a while back because i don't really feel like dating right now anyway.
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I play with my bird as much as possible. He's a great little parrot. I am athletic with a 34" waste and 3" areolas. I enjoy long walks in the yard when Im allowed out for good behavior. I have a large family, and enjoy spending as much time with them as possible. We share everything, and I mean everything, especially me and my twin brother, who loves to pretend he is me and take out my dates. I only pray during sex and long bowel movements. I am looking for a woman whose left arm is slightly shorter than her right. Ill explain that later.
Happy Hunting:)
Doug
The forums are fun there, and the people are great so far.
I know I am spinning my wheels there not having gotten done my divorce, but I have a little fun with it.
After hitting up forums, click groups at the top of that.
NOTHING like POF.
I stick with the basics: don't reveal anything too personal, tell what you are about--hobbies, things you enjoy, bucket list things, hobbies, what your personality is like.
If most daters are like me (and I'm pretty average), I think we are just looking to see if we can connect with someone, perhaps share common interests as a means to start a relationship.
And yes, I realize many can lie on these websites. That's why it pays to go slowly and listen carefully. A liar will give himself/herself away every time. Just listen. Don't believe everything you hear.
This is a good discussion as I know many are just getting into the post-divorce/break up dating and may have been out of it for many years. Don't fear it. I've met some nice people (and some turds too).
I once started to do a profile and in the middle of it decided that I sounded a whole lot like a golden retriever- fun loving, loyal, kind .... lol I don't think online dating is the route for me- at least not yet. Many years ago I met a guy online, travelled a long way to meet him only to find out that his 3 bedroom house was a mobile home that he lived in with his mother and 2 brothers! (Not saying mobile homes are bad! lol) he also had a very lengthy criminal record.
1) I don't date anyone who lives more than 50 miles from me. What's the point? I don't want a long-distance relationship. Also, it is too easy for a person to hide things if you live far from each other.
2) I am a person who doesn't trust easily so when I meet a guy and I know some details about him, I do a discreet little search on county clerk of court and municipal court websites. This is public record, so I'm not doing anything illegal. But these sites can let you know if the person is divorced or not, been convicted of crimes such as domestic violence, or perhaps is a person who can't handle money because sometimes there are financial cases. I don't tell the guy I'm doing this--just a little checking so I don't get surprised later on.
3) I take my time and I am VERY CHOOSY. In the course of one year, I may actually talk to only four guys and out of that may actually go out with only one, and sometimes none! One thing to remember is if you are just jumping into this because you are lonely--DON'T. Take time, heal, learn to be alone. If you don't, you will jump at every loser who gives you the time of day and put up with his/her shit long after you should have walked away.
4) Don't try to mold yourself to fit a guy's profile and vice versa. The "square peg-round hole" adage works here. If you really don't like fishing or hunting or geocaching or whatever the guy is interested in, don't fake it. Conversely, if a guy really isn't into what you are passionate about, no amount of time or dating is going to change this.
5) Really think about the role of children in dating. I've seen many men on dating profiles who are my age but have very young children. I've been tempted to date them, but I've had to be honest and admit I don't want to deal with little kids. Doesn't mean I'm hard-hearted, just means I've been there and done that. Some people write in profiles that they want more children. Think about it? Do you?
6) I look at what people are interested in in their profiles and also their educational background. Let's face it--we are drawn to looks first because we are visual creatures, but at some point you are going to have to communicate. Will you have enough to talk about? Will a disparity in your interests and education help or hurt this communication?
7) Take a break from using online dating. Sometimes it can be a bit demoralizing. I usually take short times off throughout the year, just to recharge my batteries and get away from the rejection, because there is a lot. If you're someone who gets feelings hurt easily, online dating may not be for you. It can be a bit impersonal and cold at times. Definitely not for the faint-of-heart.
I'm certainly no expert at this; I'm simply relaying what I've learned from dealing with online dating for the past three years.
No fat unhappy divorced American women. Require women who knows how to cook and clean. Must not be psycho, needy or strange.
Must be willing to not have a boy friend on the side.
If you meet those requirements, send $5 along with your application.